Never quite there
by Rena and her awesome self
Summary: In the "Town of Runaways" where lost people wander to, Matthew "Canada" Williams was always there. Always watching and always listening. Nobody however, did these things to him. When will people notice him? AU,Various pairings, but mainly Prussia x Canada
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own hetalia.**

Umm this isn't anything I said I would be adding but, I just wanted to write it coz I felt like it. I love this type of writing but I don't think highly of my skills in writing it.

(Originally an) AU one-shot about Canada (but I was writing it in my head and I think I will make this a series if there is feedback)

Deals with suicidal thoughts, some homophobia, low self esteem (and maybe if a series, forbidden love in general)

* * *

Fireworks filled the night sky with beautiful colours and designs celebrating the New Year. A small town celebrated their New Year passing greetings around and gathering outside to enjoy the firework display being put on courtesy of a someone people nicknamed Hong Kong.

The entire town was nicknamed after countries and that was probably the one of the very few things Matthew was included in. However, they forgot him as usual right after they nicknamed him and didn't even remember his real name. Matthew hadn't been sent an invitation to the display directly but he deserved a right to wander outside during New Years, so he did. He just so happened to be there at the same time.

Matthew "Canada" Williams, watched from the display further than the rest of the crowd feeling bad if he joined in for he wasn't invited, but he knew even if he did they wouldn't notice him, or see him and think he was a new person who moved to the town and rechristen him again as Canada… again. It had happened before and they all ignored him as he tried to explain he had been living there for a solid four years already- five soon.

He clutched his polar bear which he had found as he followed the rockets with his eyes as they shot through the air and exploded in a brilliant shimmer of different colours. He had found the polar bear a few years before but nobody paid attention to his discovery of the animal.

_Matthew walked down the small country path he had found holding a limp creature in his arms. It was injured as if though it was captured and abandoned by poachers. The ball of white fur was still breathing, but barely._

_He had tried to ask for help but was ignored by everyone. A __**polar bear**__ was just found in the middle of nowhere and nobody cared because it was Matthew who had found it. If Alfred had found it, of course it would have gotten attention. In fact, if anyone else had found it, it would have gotten a lot of attention but unfortunately, Matthew had._

_Nothing unusual._

_Matthew took it to his small house and cared for it until the polar bear could move properly and he could take it around with him safely. Even when he walked around with Kumajirou- the polar bear's name, nobody found it unusual._

A tear drop ran down his face slowly as he looked back on the previous year. It was the same as the years before and surely the New Year wouldn't bring anything else special. All he had wanted was a little bit of love or care in his life, but never did Matthew get any. Maybe he had a few people hitting on him for fun like Francis, but he nobody really _cared _for him.

From his birth, he was destined to be forgotten in a life of misfortunes. His mother and father had an unstable marriage which their mother thought would be made stable by a child. However, their marriage only got worse for she gave birth to twins and they were hardly economically stable enough to support themselves already. After Matthew and his brother Alfred were born, their mother took Matthew and left after her husband demanded her to do so. She happily left and took her maiden name back and gave it to Matthew as well.

"_Just leave!" Their father shouted through the house._

_Alfred and Matthew were in their room. Alfred was sleeping soundly through the whole thing but Matthew listened and heard them shouting. He knew that something was wrong and was very worried. The young child wanted to wake up his brother because he was scared and needed support but he got pushed away. _

"_My pleasure! I'm taking one of twin's with me!" Their mother replied with a scream as loud as their father's boom._

_Matthew heard his mother storm up the stairs and move around in her room. He knew that she was packing things quickly and they were going to their grandma's house. It happened often but the shouting that night seemed even more aggressive than usual._

_The frightened child, who was sharing the same bed as his brother crawled out and sat in the corner of the room, shivering. His tears flowed out and he told himself that crying wasn't going to help, but it relieved him._

_Matthew was correct in his assumption that they were going to their grandmother's house. However, he didn't realize it was only him going. _

_His mother stormed into the room as Alfred slept on. She spotted Matthew in the corner crying and ignored his tears. She roughly pulled him by his arm and dragged him all the way down the stairs and outside. He was in his pyjama's with no shoes. The sharp rocks he trod on hurt his feet and one even cause him to bleed, but his mother paid him no attention and ignored his pained protested to being dragged around. His mother shoved him onto a train and she threw their bags into the empty seats next to them. _

_When Matthew awoke, he was in his grandmother's house in Canada. He wouldn't see his dear brother in a long, long time._

Their parents didn't take into account the children had already grown up with each other and had clear memories of the other. Matthew always missed his brother but knew his mother wasn't in the correct emotional state to ask about his father and brother. He kept quiet all the years he grew up and eventually got fed up with his life and ran away from home.

He thought after all his misfortune that maybe he would get a little bit of luck when he met his brother on his journey but his brother had completely forgotten about Matthew and was shocked to find he had a twin.

"_That's cool! You have the same face as me! What did you say your name was again?" Alfred, Matthew's older brother asked._

_Matthew muttered his name holding back his urge to cry. He had loved his brother so much over the years and thought that he would have too but Alfred had completely forgotten about him. _

A pathetic smile appeared on Matthew's face as he mused on how foolish he was for thinking he would have some sort of drama where the long lost siblings would finally meet and they would live together happily like in those stories. Instead, Alfred had already left his father and was wandering around when Matthew found him. They both got separated and lost but Alfred found someone named Arthur who brought him to this town of wandering young people and Francis had brought Matthew. Of course by the time they were reunited in this town they called "Runaway Village" Alfred had forgotten about Matthew and so had everyone else.

The Canadian boy blinked his tears out of his eyes, holding his polar bear, Kumajirou closer to him. He felt like Kumajirou was the only one who loved him, like how a dog and man have a close friendship, but Matthew knew that of course Kumajirou wouldn't be able to share that sort of bond with him. However, the bear merely snuggled into him trying his best to comfort the person he often saw, but not quite grasping who he was yet.

Matthew stood gazing upon a happy scene of young people celebrating, happily. Their faces filled with smiles and the air full of laughter when there were no fireworks. He spotted his brother, among them. His brother was so popular and outgoing. Nobody failed to notice him. His smile lit up his face as he ran around recklessly with his golden hair shining around him and his sapphire eyes glinted with happiness.

Matthew felt more tears immerging. He knew that smile belonged at home in America with his mother and father. The pain within Matthew's heart twisted up and clenched tighter everytime he remembered that he caused his family's collapse. If only Alfred had been an only child, the Jones family would have been well off and very proud. Alfred would have made them happy. Matthew only brought gloom.

He left his house because he felt like his mother hated him. As if though, he was the source of all her problems. The poor boy believed she hated him.

"Hey, Kuma, do you think everything would be better without me?" He mumbled to his polar bear.

The white bear turned and stared up at his owner and gazed into his violet eyes. A strange colour, but it didn't seem so rare as Roderich (nicknamed "Austria") shared the same, however, since nobody noticed Matthew, it seemed unique. The violet eyes contained so much pain hidden behind them. The pain which everyone failed to see in front of them.

"I…I've been thinking…" The teary Canadian paused before continuing, watching a firework and it's beautiful display.

"I shouldn't be here. In this world I mean…" He continued speaking to his only friend in the town.

Kumajirou shifted slightly in Matthew's arms, as if trying to lift itself higher, but ended up pulling his sleeves up his arms, which seemed to be the true goal of the bear's actions.

Revealed on his wrists were a few scars and some unhealed scabs from previous low points during his life. Matthew's eyes seared, overfilling with more tears which dropped onto Kumajirou's head.

_Matthew sat on the floor of his room, a broken piece of mirror which he smashed, disgusted by his own reflection in his hand. He clenched it until his hand bleed and he brought the sharp edge to his wrists. He cut a small line where small beads of blood appeared but nothing more. The red liquid was joined by a clear, salty droplet. His tears._

_Kumajirou walked in and nudged Matthew's side which made Matthew drop the glass from the mirror and treat his wound, too afraid to visit the doctor. He would be questioned but then he thought about it carefully and he realized the doctor wouldn't even care about him. _

_Attempted suicide? _

_He laughed at himself for trying._

"I'm even too much of a coward to do that though!" He yelled as the finale of fireworks began.

He dropped to his knees keeping Kumajirou- the reason he stopped cutting himself, safe from his suddenly fall. He wept and sobbed loudly, unheard by the people of the town, as they cheered at the display. They laughed, he wept, their hearts filled with joy, his filled with his sorrow.

They failed to acknowledge him, so of course they wouldn't be able to notice his problems. Matthew was always over shadowed by everyone and everything. They paid more attention to a trail of ants than himself when he had left his house for the first time in weeks with his injured wrists.

Matthew had always been on the edge of the line between depression and suicide. Everytime he wanted to cross over, he felt to afraid. He was always close, but never quite there. Even in normal situations, he was never quite intelligent, but never quite dumb. He wasn't super athletic, but he wasn't a weakling. He was just, never quite _there_. "There" being perfection.

Matthew let out a dark and pathetic laugh, laughing at his own existence and cowardice. There wasn't any reason for him to be alive. He was so pitiful yet everyone failed to notice him. He found it amusing, the story of his life. He could see the ending already, he decided that with the decade's ending, he should end his own life. There was nothing to be scared of anymore. He didn't care. It would be less painful killing himself than living in the world where he saw, heard and felt everything, when nothing would do the same to him. He planned to go make his way to the forest nearby town where people hardly went and hang himself.

He thought about how much the people would care. How much would his brother care?

He wouldn't.

Tears kept falling out, and Matthew was crying at a louder volume. The fireworks were still going and nobody even knew he existed, so how would they notice him crying? If they noticed the crying they would all think it was a ghost of some sort. Matthew just needed love, just a little bit of care would make him happy, but he was cursed to have nothing.

"Hey can you not cry? It's not awesome."

Matthew looked up and met a pair of annoyed looking eyes.

Even though they looked annoyed, Matthew looked past that and admired the beauty of the colour. They were a beautiful ruby red that seemed to shine in the dark sky. He was more attracted to the man's eyes than he was the fireworks.

Matthew blushed but it didn't seem noticeable in the dark. He had never really called another guy beautiful before and he didn't want to make a habit out of it. Everyone in the town were only friends- family at the most, but they would surely shun anyone who showed any signs of being gay.

"Well because I told you to stop crying you have to listen because I'm awesome." The man stated as fact.

Matthew felt his tears stop, as he looked up to the man standing over him. His face was smug as he noticed at Matthew in fact did stop crying when he said so, for he always wanted things to work for him. They did because he was awesome like that.

"Anyway, may my awesome presence grace you sometime again." The mysterious man called as he went to join the crowd.

The people were still celebrating the New Year and when the man went to go join the crowd, a few people seemed to greet him. It seemed like he was well known by them even though Matthew was positive the man didn't live there. It was sure to be true since Matthew saw everything.

Kumajirou nudged Matthew a little, pulling him out of his little world. He realized that he was staring at the man. Even from a distance he was amazing. The feeling he gave out to people seemed to differ with the villagers, but he was well known among them. Maybe he had joined the "Runaway Village" as they called it, left before Matthew and Alfred had joined? Well one thing Matthew knew was that the man was definitely the opposite of himself.

Kumajirou trotted off towards Matthew's house, leaving his owner to gaze at the person who noticed him. The watched the man while slowly releasing his hands from their balled up position.

Just looking at him made him feel… different. It was a feeling which Matthew had never felt before. It was a feeling within his body which made his heart full of something, twisting up. His stomach was just the same, feeling tight yet somehow loose at the same time for it seemed to flip. The feeling made his cheeks hot and made him happy yet upset at the fact he had some uncertainty about something.

Matthew questioned the feeling. He tried to think back on things and think about what it was. Nothing he thought of made him feel the same way until he remembered reading a novel. It was a novel written in first person about a woman…

In love.

Matthew quickly threw that concept out of the window. He knew it was stupid because he was a guy and so was that man. It was ridiculous for him to be attracted to another man because he knew it was… was… just wrong. He himself had a slight case of homophobia but respected them for they were human too. However there was no way he was going to accept being attracted to him, because even though he respected them for they were brave enough to show they were in love with someone the same gender, he knew he was slightly indifferent to homosexuals.

It was just that because he was noticed, he was happy.

That all there was to it.

After realizing he was staring, Matthew stood up and left the people celebrating to go join his beloved pet in his house. It was small and cold inside the house, but his heart was still warm from the feeling of being noticed. Matthew tried to recall the last time he had felt happy or had the lovely warm feeling inside him but couldn't think of anytime he did. He was so pitiful… he had not felt the feeling of happiness for so long, he couldn't even recall it.

"Happy new year Kumajirou." Matthew whispered as he curled up in his bed, hoping his year would finally change.

But would it?

---

"_Did you hear?"_

"_Yeah about that dead person they found!"_

* * *

Well a kinda ambiguous ending. We don't know what's happened so it could be anyone. But I haven't decided.

I started this near the beginning of the year so it has the New Years theme.

About "The Runaway Town" I never got to develop it. It was actually meant to be that they were a bunch of lost young people (In this case the hetalia cast) who have run away from their life and in the end, find themselves in the town and most of them were runaways so they renamed themselves after countries to get rid of their old names and memories. (Or something like that in my head.)

Well no lessons on Friday coz it's my School's founder's feastday~! And there's non-uniform. Oh and sales for people in Haiti. I've donated quite a bit of money and please if you have a chance help too!


	2. Chapter 2

I do not own Hetalia.

Well I already thought of what else I could write and I couldn't leave it alone. Also, a few people added it to their alert list and favourite list. Although be warned, I have slight writers block.

I'm sorry had school crap going on but it's half term now. This may be monthly but may change when I finish Inherited Rivalry.

* * *

Gilbert refused to listen to the news.

The guy he had met on New Years day… he went missing and they found a body in the woods. The body was taken away to be identified and many people were afraid that they had a murderer near them.

It angered Gilbert how nobody noticed that the person he saw was missing. It seemed like they all refused to acknowledge him. He didn't even know the guy's name so he couldn't even ask anyone about him.

When Gilbert had seen Matthew, he seemed to stick out to him. Everyone was in the crowd celebrating the New Year while Matthew was a person hiding away from them, crying while they cheered. It was a scene that awesome people didn't ignore. Awesome people, went and helped the not-so-awesome person.

What angered him the most was the fact that even after he just graced the town in his awesomeness, the person leaves. The only people who seemed to have known Matthew were Francis and someone who wouldn't give his real name but opted to go by his country nickname. Apparently though, they didn't seem to know him properly. "Cuba" had hit him once thinking it was Alfred because apparently they looked the same but to Gilbert they were completely different in all ways, thus him questioning the Cuban's eyesight. Then his close friend Francis apparently messed around with him for a few weeks, but after that he didn't see him much afterwards.

"What country was he named after?" Antonio asked wanting to help his distressed friend find out who he saw.

"I don't know. I just ordered him to stop crying before leaving him with my awesomeness." Gilbert replied with a sigh.

They were in the small café, drinking hot drinks in the warmth while they watched snow falling outside. It had a nice atmosphere inside the café, for it was calming. It was soothing to be in there, so often the other people in the town went there to do work. The aura was so calming, it managed to make the usually rowdy "Bad Touch Trio", mellow.

"Well let's go through the process of elimination then." Francis suggested to them while taking a sip of his coffee.

"For a start, that means it can't be Spain, Prussia/East Germany or France." Antonio said obviously, for they were those countries.

"Or West Germany, North/South Italy, Austria or that barbarian Hungary." Gilbert added ticking off people he usually saw. And ticked off.

Gilbert stirred his hot chocolate trying to cool it down before he drank it. He watched the steam flowing out of it into the air thinking about how it just faded afterwards. A lot like the guy he saw. There were still a few other countries to go and he didn't even know why he wanted to know who he was in the first place.

"Not England, China, Russia or America." Francis stated while winking at a girl walking by.

Gilbert shuddered at the mentioning of two names.

England and Russia. Arthur Kirkland and Ivan Braginski.

Once, someone asked him to go try Arthur's food, then when he posted he was going to try his food on his blog, everyone started to comment on it saying things about him dying or mourning for him early. He soon found out why.

Then there was Ivan. He once had to stay at his house because there were problems in his own and he was a total maniac to live with. The experience made Gilbert hate him and they didn't get on very well.

"Since Francis seems to remember him, maybe he's got a relation to him?" Antonio suggested, trying to be helpful.

Gilbert nodded and Francis raked him brain for his old friends and such. Even though they were all working so hard to find out who the person Gilbert was trying to remember was, they actually didn't why they were trying so hard. Although they knew Gilbert was annoyed for him leaving after he had tried to cheer him up and he wouldn't shut up about it until he was satisfied with something.

"Well it can't be Seychelles, she's a girl. A pretty cute one too…" Francis went into his own little world of thoughts, leaving Antonio and Gilbert to try figuring out who they were looking for.

"Well let's see… that time we had a mini war in the town he was in the Allied Powers. So let's start from Yao. He's China which leads into Asian countries, which goes to Japan, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Thailand and South Korea so it can't be those country names because I've already met them." Gilbert said eliminating them from the possibility lists.

"I think I remember Yao and that annoying one who says he wants to bring _kimchi _into space, Yong Soo would crash at Matthew's house sometimes. Now, what country was Matthew called again?" Francis thought as he broke free of his perverted thoughts.

They were finally on track but they found a new trouble as they had to try finding countries which were like Matthew. The a few people passing by the town in the cafe was confused by their references to countries as people, but that wasn't any of their concern anyway.

"Mexico?" Antonio suggested following a girl with his eyes who giggled to her friend when she saw him staring.

Gilbert usually was the one to flirt with random girls as well but he was so focused on the person he had met. Francis and Antonio didn't miss this as they saw many opportunities in which Gilbert had a chance to send over any winks or smiles to girls staring at the table, but he was so engrossed in trying to learn of the mystery person.

"Mexico left for a bit." Francis added eliminating them.

"By the way, who is Matthew? I haven't met that one before." Gilbert asked resting his head on the table in boredom while he started flicking empty sachets of sugar left on the table towards Antonio.

Antonio looked towards Francis for the answer for he didn't know who Matthew was either. Then it took him a few seconds to remember who exactly he was.

"You know! The one I brought here a few years…months… errr… x-amount ago. He's kind of tall, blonde hair and he has one strand which is just really curly and fun to play with…! I think…" He replied unsure as he went on explaining him.

Francis used to tease Matthew a lot when he brought him to the town and he could spot him easily but nowadays, he just doesn't see him around. In fact, he hadn't seen him around for awhile, but that wasn't that strange. However for some reason he suspected that the person Gilbert was looking for and couldn't find was…

"Hey that sounds like him!" Gilbert exclaimed, shooting up from his position and slamming the table, causing the holder which had some stirrers for the beverages they sold shake a little.

He had secretly wanted to play with the curly strand because it reminded him of bullying Austria.

Antonio silently apologized to the kind owner who didn't mind the Bad Touch Trio as much, as long as they didn't do anything to brash. Gilbert was being himself and the owner had missed him since he went back home to Germany for a bit, hence the reason why Matthew and he hadn't met. When Matthew came, Gilbert had just left a few weeks before to go back home to do something about studying with birds.

"Yay~!" Antonio clapped quietly after the owner nodded accepting the apology-"But now what?" He asked soon after.

Gilbert grinned and rolled his eyes like the answer was obvious- In this case, it truly was. They were going to be "The New Austria". That meant they were going to be bullying them or just annoying them in general. They all seemed to be on the same wavelength and they all left the café at the same time going towards somewhere which they had no idea.

It seemed as if they were all following each other, thinking that one of them knew the way but they were all walking blindly around the town.

---

Within the forest where the person on the news was murdered, laid Kumajirou. He was lost, looking everywhere for a way to get out of the wild terrain. The polar bear knew the way out, but it was struggling to get there. But as soon as it left the wood area, it would need to find someone to help it.

After managing its way through the floor of the woods and climbing over the trunks, it found itself at the clearing where the entrance to the woods was. Although it was a polar bear, it of course had intellect and new it was in the right area. Slowly approaching it was a small group of guys.

"Hey I've been meaning to ask, but where exactly does Matthew live?" Antonio asked as he looked at the entrance of the woods and the miles of trees.

"What? I thought you knew." Gilbert said in surprise

They both looked over to Francis who looked clueless and it finally dawned on them that they had been wandering into the wrong area. What made it worse was that they looked around and saw the sign for the woods was the exact one which was going around the town.

"Isn't this where…" He started, but was unable to complete due to the situation.

It was the very woods which were in everyone's ears. The one where the body was found.

Before, the trees looked friendly as if though inviting them in to enjoy nature, the birds flying was a beautiful sight and the snow falling was a beautiful scene. However, everything transformed before their eyes into the trees, hiding expressions and evils behind them, the birds flying away from the horrors and the ravens sending omens. The snow would cover their tracks and nobody would find them…

Just as they were about to turn back and leave, Gilbert spotted something moving in the snow. It was moving towards them and he wondered what it was. He squinted, narrowing his ruby eyes and managed to make out what the creature was.

"I spy, with my awesome eye, a certain somebody's pet!" He yelled as he ran towards the polar bear and closer to the entrance of the forest with the murder.

Francis and Antonio gave each other cynical looks before shrugging their shoulders and following Gilbert who was crouched down playing with a polar bear. Polar bears weren't meant to be in their area, so they found it strange, but Gilbert didn't seem to know or care.

"The dude I was looking for was with this thing." Gilbert stated as he picked up at polar bear which seemed to recognise him.

"Well then why would Matthew be out here?" Antonio asked still wary of his surroundings.

Kumajirou squirmed out of Gilbert's arms and tugged on his leg before walking into the forest. It was a sign to follow him but nobody wanted to go in. There was a dead body found in there and they weren't sure if it was murder or what, but there were no forensic investigations going on so it was safe to go in.

Gilbert followed the polar bear slowly who waited for him. Francis and Antonio felt as if they had to go with him because no matter what, they said they were the "Bad Touch Trio" (other dubbed as other names) even though they were very unsure of what they were getting themselves into. They decided that being wild and reckless was something they did.

They three of them kept close to each other as they went through the darkening forest. They cursed the fact that winter would make the days seem shorter. It was snowing earlier and the trees had none of their leaves left.

Kumajirou had memorised the way in and the way out of the forest by now and was leading them perfectly down the safe route of the forest. The others didn't even know where they were going.

"Hey what if it's taking us to a pile of its shit?" Francis asked worried

Gilbert cackled and shook his head. Antonio wasn't so sure about following the bear.

"You never know…" He added while wrapping his scarf around his neck in a different way to get more warmth.

They had been walking for about ten minutes when finally, the polar bear stopped walking and was sitting by a large trunk. The three others stopped and wondered what they were looking for.

"See! It really didn't lead us to anything important!" Francis yelled in panic.

None of them knew the way out of the forest and the snow had covered their foot prints already. They wondered why they had been stupid enough to follow Kumajirou in the first place. Panic was dominant in them now as they were stomping around wondering what to do. During this time, Kumajirou went inside the hollow part of the tree trunk.

Francis and Gilbert were arguing over the way they were going to get out when Antonio saw the polar bear prod something out of there. It was large and solid.

"Stop fighting, look!" He shouted, standing up to stop them fighting.

They watched as the figure was being pushed out of the hollow tree and all went over to help the polar bear.

"This is…this is him!" Gilbert shouted as he pulled the body from inside the tree.

They all crowded around Matthew, trying to wipe the snow off his front where the wind must have blown the white substance into the tree. His skin was freezing and his lips were blue. Immediately, they took off some clothing to give to him. Gilbert checked if Matthew was breathing and checked his pulse afterwards. It was slow and faint, but he was alive.

"Matthew! What happened?" Francis asked panicked when he spotted on his leg.

There was a huge spot of blood on his leg where there was an injury. It was wrapped with his scarf to stop it bleeding as much, but it needed to be treated. They had no idea how long he had been in the icy forest for, but it was surely long enough.

"We need to get him treated, I think he's going into hypothermia and there's this injury on his leg. It might get infected." Antonio said calmly trying to control them.

They nodded. They knew there was no signal in the area and they had to carry him out then all the emergency services, but then since they are a small town a little far from most places, they were going to take long.

"There's a problem though." Gilbert announced.

It hit all of them at the same time.

"WE DON'T KNOW THE FUCKING WAY OUT!" They all yelled in distress at the same time.

With that said, Kumajirou started to lead the way again, but faster than earlier because; he was sure of the direction of the entrance, having travelled there looking for help and travelling from there with them.

They all looked at each other, knowing that now they could rely on the polar and it was their only clue anyway so it was better than nothing. They held Matthew horizontally due to the wound on his left leg. Luckily, even if they were all delinquents at school, they listened to something.

"Damn we need to thank Mrs. Karpusi for making us listen to her health class lectures." Gilbert added as they walked through the snow.

* * *

Wow I ended this chapter really badly. Well thanks for reading the next chapter they seem to be decreasing in size though. I'll try making the next one a bit longer.


	3. Chapter 3

I do not own hetalia.

I'm going to have an operation on my hand and even though this is monthly, I sometimes try to write during the month and next chapter may be put behind because of my hand recovering.

I don't know much about hospitals and procedures, so I'm sorry if it is incorrect.

Anyways~ here is the next chapter!

* * *

The forest was getting darker and darker as the day was leaving. The winter stole the sun away so much. It greatly annoyed one when within a forest trying to carry an injured person out.

"Ah! I almost tripped again!" Antonio cried out as his foot caught on a root from a tree in the bare leaved, but excessive forest.

It was difficult carrying a grown man out of a snowy dark forest with only a tiny polar bear guiding you out. It was a lesson that The Bad Touch Trio just learnt. They had happened to get lost and then decided to be stupid and follow the polar bear.

Well at least they were saving a life.

"Do you think he'll survive?" France asked worried as he helped guide Gilbert and Antonio through the growing dark along with the polar bear.

When they had last checked, Matthew had a weak pulse and his breathing was very strained. The thing that scared them the most was the large amount of blood dripping from his leg. Even though it was bound tightly with a scarf, there was a lot of blood still dripping from it.

"He will." Gilbert stated.

It was obvious to him. He thought, if the Awesomeness of them was there, of course he would survive. However, even if he thought that, the worry was nagging in the back of his mind about the chance of him dying. There was no way they would let him die.

Kumajirou was guiding them out and knew the end was near. Even though he didn't know what to do after getting them out of the forest, he knew that humans were also smart creatures. They could do many things and he knew they _had _to save his owner.

The snow was getting thicker as they were near the very end of the forest and it was extremely dark by the time they were almost at the clearing where the entry was. The snow was almost up to their knees as they trudged through.

Finally, they saw the clearing, where they hoped that they could call for help. There was no chance of a helicopter rescue due to the weather conditions. That meant the hospital had to send an ambulance to them which would take awhile. The Bad Touch Trio had no idea how long Matthew could survive for, but they knew he was close to death.

Francis had been in front of Antonio and Gilbert, guiding them while he followed Kumajirou, for it had been too dark for them to see the small bear while carrying Matthew, so Francis went ahead, for he was easier to spot, especially in his bright clothes. As soon as Kumajirou started running into the clearing and the entrance/exit of the forest, he followed and took out his cell phone, hoping that there signal around the around.

Relief swept over Antonio and Gilbert as the slowly put Matthew down, pressing down on his wound, trying to stop the blood some more. They were breathing heavily and sweating, but the icy wind cooled them down from their hard work. They had a few things less to worry about.

Francis stared at his phone and moved around so he could get a bar, Antonio stood up and did the same while Gilbert tried to keep pressure on Matthew's wound and keep him warm.

"Yes, I've got one!" Francis yelled, which could hardly be heard against the howling wind.

They were worried that emergency services might not be able to hear them over the wind, so they had to be careful when speaking and had to cover the mic.

Antonio rushed back to Gilbert and Matthew to get ready to do whatever they would tell them to do while Francis dialled the three magic numbers.

"_Hello which service would you like?" _ A calm voice on the other side of the phoneline asked.

"Can you send an ambulance to Hetare woods? We've found someone whose leg is injured and bleeding badly and they might be going into hypothermia." Francis asked just as calmly, covering the phone so the wind wouldn't disturb his voice.

Gilbert watched as he put the phone down and nodded at him. Relief once again calmed him. His red eyes looked down at Matthew who was unconscious, but alive. They continued to gaze upon the pale face of the person who he had saved twice already, the first without realizing it. There was no reason for him to care so much for the person but yet he still did. They didn't have any sort of friendship and Gilbert hadn't heard Matthew speak yet since he just spoke and left.

Sooner than expected, they heard sirens from the ambulance racing to where they were. It was still snowing heavily and the ambulance had to be careful be fast. It didn't take too long for them to get to the forest and since they already cleared the road getting there, it would take even less time to get back to get back.

Everything moved too fast for Gilbert to keep up with due to either shock or because it was just because the snow confused him but he found himself sitting in the back of the ambulance with Matthew, Antonio and Francis. The sirens were on and they didn't stop once during the journey to the hospital. Gilbert looked down again at Matthew, keeping his name in his head so he could be the only person awesome enough to remember it.

After a few minutes, the ambulance stopped and Matthew was taken out of the back with a stretcher. The Bad Touch Trio were told to wait for him if they wished or they could contact any relatives of Matthew if they wanted. They couldn't do that since they didn't realize that Alfred was Matthew's _twin_ brother and in The Town of Runaways, they didn't have many links with their family anymore.

They ended up lounging around the waiting area where they had a few other anxious people waiting for someone to get out of surgery. Antonio boredly read through leaflets about smoking and organ donations as Francis was observing Gilbert. In the back of the ambulance he saw him watching Matthew fondly. It made him wonder if they had been friends previously for they seemed to have a bond of some sort. It struck him as strange for he had to struggle remembering Matthew's name and he stated that he had only met him during New Years. Perhaps Matthew had reminded him of someone whom he cared about, but the only person he cared about much was himself and maybe a few other people like his little brother, Ludwig.

Gilbert was trying to be normal but he felt nervous about what was going to happen to Matthew. They had said they were operating his leg because there was a foreign object inside there causing the bleeding. It seemed as if though it was stabbed and not accidental but that was all they could give at the point of time for they still needed to take more tests.

The fact which annoyed Gilbert the most was that he was feeling something he didn't like. He detested feeling nervous and being weak. Matthew was weak because he had been crying when Gilbert saw him but Gilbert was thinking that maybe he was strong for surviving in the icy forest for so long and he was fighting for his life again in the hospital.

"Hey guys, should I head back to the town to tell everyone about Michael?" Antonio asked as he stood up and stretched.

"His name is Matthew." Gilbert corrected

They had been in the hospital for almost two hours and Antonio was the one with least interest in Matthew. It's not like he didn't care, it's just that he thought it was best to go tell everyone that a fellow member of their society was in hospital and it would be nice to visit him. If nobody would come, he would drag at least the Italian brothers- Lovino and Feliciano, over with him. It was best he could do for someone with almost no family to contact.

"I'll go with you, I need to find that bear he had." Francis said, also standing up and stretching.

"I'll just stay here and wait then. I'll contact you when I know what's going on." Gilbert concluded as they all nodded and the two of the three left.

Gilbert didn't mind waiting which was unusual because he was usually inpatient with many things. Even though he was fine with waiting, his stomach was doing something strange where it felt like it was moving. Gilbert had often been told that was when he was nervous or anxious but he brushed those theories away because he knew he never felt those weak emotions.

---

In the town, they were having the weekend clean up where they would go around and collect a few bits of litter because they didn't have the luxury of street cleaners in the small area. It was quite remote but not too far from a proper area.

They were paired with another person from the community and were allocated an area and time to return. Since it was weekly, they rotated and this time, Feliciano was with Alfred.

Feliciano had taken the name of Italy Veneziano to distinguish him from his older brother, Lovino, who was Italy Romano. Feliciano was a cheery young man and was everyone's friend even though he often was very blunt and said thing about them aloud and freely, not trying to be mean, but simply stating facts.

Alfred was (unknowingly) Matthew's older brother and he took the country of America. He was proud to have it and often went about being a stereotypical American. Often he would be stupid and he was carefree like Italy. It was strange as to how they were paired up because there was a chance they may make more mess being there than them trying to clean it up.

They were shovelling snow out of the paths to make it easier for people to move around, doing their own thing for the community since there was snow hiding the litter. Alfred found it easier to shovel than Feliciano who was too lazy to do it and preferred picking any bits of litter he found, for cleaning was what he was better at.

Trying to make a light conversation, Feliciano spoke about random things, as he always did.

"So what was your childhood dream?" He asked Alfred while tying the bag of rubbish he had collected.

Feliciano expected the response as Alfred shovelled the snow once more before (dangerously) swinging the shovel over his shoulder and smiling. He put his thumb up as he answered.

"I've always wanted to be the hero!" He exclaimed with his ever bright grin.

Feliciano giggled at the response and wondered who he wanted to save, for surely a hero to become a hero, there would need someone who needed their help. He pulled the plastic bag he just tied to the pile of other plastic bags and turned to his friend once again.

"Who did you need to save?" He asked casually while taking some grit and sprinkling it on the path that was just shovelled.

Alfred took a moment to think. As far as he remembered, he had just always had the desire to be one. There hadn't been anyone he wanted to save or anything but one day he just decided, just like that. The memory of the day seemed have been lost in his brain filled with other things. There was a vague memory of his room seeming larger than before, but that seemed like a completely different subject.

"I guess I saw it on TV or something and wanted to be as awesome as that." He decided, not sure of what had really happened.

Feliciano seemed to accept the answer for there was nothing really wrong with it. He didn't think much of it and continued to talk about other things, but for some reason, it stuck in Alfred's mind. There was something about the question which made him feel agitated, but he couldn't grasp any memories.

Who was he trying to save?

---

Gilbert sighed as he stared at the vending machine and the hot drinks inside. He wondered if he should get the energy drink or canned coffee, trying to get the events of the previous night out of his head. It was stressing and confusing but he still tried to calm himself by thinking about, well his awesome self.

Deciding to buy an energy drink, Gilbert walked off to the waiting area for a bit. He had pulled an all nighter and was feeling drowsy. The drink didn't help. The seats were made to be comfortable for people waiting all night for their friends and family but they just seemed to make Gilbert's butt ache. After slowly sipping the bottle of sweet caffeine to somehow pass the time, he felt the need to go to the toilet.

Standing up to throw the bottle in the bin, Gilbert wandered off towards the lavatory where he had been so many times before, but for no reason. It wasn't like he was nervous or anything, because he thought he didn't care much about Matthew. Once finished with his business, Gilbert washed his hands and looked at himself in the mirror. There were bags under his eyes but he considered him still as handsome as ever.

"Man… why am I so worried?" He wondered aloud as he threw a paper towel into the bin.

When he got back, he asked another nurse about Matthew. He had been asking every hour about him and finally, the nurse told him it was okay to go see him but he was resting. Gilbert sighed in relief and felt somewhat calmer than before. It was great that he managed to help save someone's life even though that wasn't something people would expect from The Bad Touch Trio.

Quickly moving to an area of the hospital which allowed cellphones, he called Francis who picked up after a few rings.

Back at the town, Francis had found the polar bear outside a house which he suspected to be Matthew's house. Antonio was telling a few people such as Feliciano and Lovino about what had happened in the forest and it had soon spread from person to person until most of them knew about the event. However, even when Matthew was the centre of attention, nobody knew who he was, for Matthew wasn't acknowledged by many people.

"_Hey good news, Matthew's operation on his leg was fine though apparently he was stabbed and the knife broke inside his leg and almost cut a large artery. Come over with anyone who wants to come, but he's resting now." _Gilbert said with a tinge of excitement in his voice even though he was trying to keep it hidden.

It wasn't hidden badly, or hidden exactly well either, but all the same, Francis picked it out and realized how noticeably different he was from when he had been waiting for the news on the operation result. He still suspected it was due to some long lost friend thing or perhaps Matthew reminded him of a certain somebody of his past, but there was no way to tell.

"That's good to hear. I'll tell Antonio and ask any other people to come." Francis replied.

"_I'll be coming back to change then we'll all go see Matthew together okay?" _Gilbert said looking for confirmation.

"Yeah, yeah, just hurry back because we want to go see him." Francis answered before he heard Gilbert slam his phone shut.

Francis was glad that Matthew was safe too, because he had brought Matthew to The Town of Runaways first. Even though he forgot about him for a long period of time, he still felt like the older brother figure of him and held some fondness for him and was happy for his health.

There wasn't much of a different feeling with Antonio, he was glad too even though he hardly knew Matthew, but because he had helped him, he felt that he was getting better. Francis deemed the fact that Gilbert seemed so interested in Matthew in the first place as nothing, for Francis had felt drawn to Matthew when he first noticed him and that was when he first approached him and took him to The Town of Runaways.

Francis closed his own phone and turned to Antonio who was just speaking to some girls, trying to impress them about the fact that he had helped save a life from the forest where the dead body was found. Francis went over to join him for he couldn't resist beautiful beings. Although he only felt lustful towards the females, he just admired the males.

"I also helped with saving the poor boy's life." He said while walking over, earning himself some attention as well.

Both Antonio and Francis had a small group of girls around them when Alfred was looking all over for them. The town was small and news spread quickly, and it wasn't long before he had reached Alfred's ears. He was shocked and angered to find that The Bad Touch Trio had saved a person's life. It meant that _they _were heroes. Alfred was quite childish and felt that only _he_ was aloud to be the hero.

Alfred had dragged Arthur, one of his close friends with him to go find the three of them. He wanted to get it straight that only he was allowed to be the hero and they should carry on being the anti-heroes or sometimes even foes. Arthur was only going around because he had heard that the person who was found in the forest was Matthew and he vaguely remembered letting Matthew stay in his house for a bit, but that was a faded memory.

When they spotted Antonio and Francis, Alfred quickly broke up the crowd around them as he made them scatter with his strange remarks. He spoke when they all left and ignored the lecture Arthur was going to give him.

"You guys are not allowed to be heroes. Only I am allowed to be the hero." He stated simply with a non serious aggression in his voice. Instead, it was just his childish one.

Arthur sighed and wondered how the town was full of idiots and how he was surrounded by people he hated. He used to know Francis when he was little and he used to bully Antonio when they were new to the town. Being the only "gentleman" in the area, he decided to quickly halt where Alfred's conversation was heading.

"Can we go see err, what was his name again?" He asked, forgetting the name of poor Matthew.

Francis shook his head, not by refusing him, but a in a way showing he was disappointed in him.

"Matthew, and yes you can come along." He said as Antonio kept trying to knock the back of Alfred's knees.

Alfred wanted to see the person they had saved because he wanted to go pretend he was the hero or perhaps save him from something as well and claim to be a better hero than The Bad Touch Trio were. It was a genius plan in his mind but ever so childish.

As Francis and Arthur had an argument over something and Antonio had grown bored of making Alfred's knees buckle when he hit them, he went off to go find some other people who might want to go see Matthew in hospital. He remembered that apparently Yao and Yong Soo liked to go to his house sometimes, but he wasn't sure if they remembered him. It was going to be easy to get the Italy brothers to come with him since they were usually willing to go, but other than that, there wasn't really anyone he knew, especially when he hardly knew Matthew himself.

He spotted Yong Soo annoying Yao and asked them if they wanted to go see Matthew but they couldn't remember him that well until he reminded them of them hanging out at his house. In the end, they agreed to go visit him. Just as Antonio was going to go back to the others who were in the main part of town, he spotted Gilbert leaving his house after he had changed.

Gilbert soon spotted Antonio and waved him over so they could walk to meet everyone who was going to visit Matthew. He was noticeably more cheery than inside the hospital, but it was expected since anyone would be gloomy in the situation they were put it.

"Man it's cold…" Antonio complained as he walked with Gilbert who nodded in agreement.

Without saying anything much about Matthew, the two spoke until they saw everyone who was going with them to see Matthew. Arthur and Alfred were there, bickering about something while Lovino and Feliciano were being wary of Francis who was busy arguing with Yong Soo about being perverted while Yao was glad they were both too busy arguing to annoy him. It seemed a few people joined them for Ludwig, Gilbert's brother, was there with Elizaveta who wanted to check up on a fellow citizen in their society and apologize to him if Gilbert had done anything wrong. There was also the guy that Gilbert had asked about Matthew previously who hated his real name and used Cuba as his real one. Either way, both were accepted when introducing oneself in the town.

Gilbert whistled; there were quite a lot of people surprisingly. Although the majority didn't actually know Matthew properly, they were all going to see him anyway. It kind of made him angry that they didn't know him, but it was good they were making an effort for him.

"Well, let's go!" Gilbert commanded as he went ahead of everyone who followed him, annoyed that they were being told what to do as if though it was Alfred telling them.

The person the whole town was talking about still remained a mystery despite him being in most of their conversations. Matthew remained unknown in most of their lives, but for a few, he was going to be the person who they would remember most.

* * *

Sorry about this being monthly. Thank you for waiting so patiently and for the people who reviewed, another thanks to you guys.

This is extremely likely to be a long thing because I've been planning the storyline for this and it deals a lot with forbidden love, so just remember, this has to be viewed from a non fangirl point of view since homophobia's gonna be a big factor to this.


	4. Chapter 4

**I do not own hetalia.**

My friend says I'm obsessed with my guitars. Maybe I should stop speaking about them… (actually I'm obsessed with Durarara!! And Hetalia…)

Sorry for the late update and the fact this is monthly. I also don't know about hospital procedures, sorry again!

* * *

Matthew sat up in bed and inspected everything around him. There were unknown people walking around and the heavy beeping of the machinery from several different areas around him. Looking down, he saw that his arm had a drip attached to it and was taking liquid into his body from the IV bag next to him.

He looked at his wrist. The scabs and scars were all lines of brown and red, flurried across his wrist. A sigh of relief escaped him as he was slightly glad to have grazed himself while in the forest because it covered the evidence of his attempted suicide. The one he had been too afraid to complete.

"They'd probably ignore them since it's _me_ after all." Matthew muttered as he noticed the nurses ignore his almost empty IV bag.

Matthew wondered why he hadn't decided to kill himself on New Years. His life hadn't improved during that time. After all he was almost murdered for witnessing a murder himself.

All Matthew had been doing was going to the woods because he enjoyed the loneliness of the forest. It was nice to sit there in whatever weather and just reflect on life. When sitting in there, the mind felt clear and he felt like it was fine to not be noticed there because there was nobody to notice him in the first place. Well, more like nobody to ignore him.

Matthew went to the area where he usually went to when he relaxed in the forest. It was quite ironic since he had planned on killing himself there but instead he was happily sitting on the cold stumps of the trees, watching the world go by. There were a few animals around due to it being winter but that didn't stop him from watching the clouds creep closer or admiring the frost on the bare trees.

There was a tranquil atmosphere until he heard some noises which seemed to be coming from something too large to be animals. Matthew didn't feel threatened since it was a local forest where people could go to if they wished, although hardly anyone went. It was also highly unlikely anyone would realize he was there in the first place.

"Why are you running away?"

The voice was shrill and sounded desperate. Matthew noted that the voice was from a girl which didn't sound too old to be an adult but it wasn't a child or teenager. It was like a young adult's voice. There was another voice which Matthew knew well.

"Please leave me alone!" The second voice cried.

The voice was from Ivan. Matthew knew him back in the Town of Runaways and there were strange rumours going on about Ivan recently which kind of scared him. There were rumours of him murdering people and that the person they found in the forest one of his victims. Matthew knew that it was a rumour but he couldn't say if it was true or not.

"Big brother! I've done this for you!" The first unknown voice yelled.

"Go away Natalia!" Ivan shouted back at what must have been his sister.

Matthew heard the rustling get closer to him meaning that they were getting closer to him. He wasn't sure if he should have ran or not, but he felt something which told him that he should have been listening to the conversation. Before Matthew could get up to leave the area just in case something was wrong, Ivan and a beautiful girl burst through into the clearing, which left him like a deer in the headlights. He stood, wide eyed as Ivan was equally as shocked to see someone there.

Just when Matthew needed to be ignored, he was there being stared at.

The beautiful girl's eyes narrowed as she saw an interruption in her "love". Matthew was stopping her from being with her brother alone, so he needed to get out of the way. Just like how the other people had gotten in her away. The simple way to get rid of them was easy.

Kill them.

Dropping the arm of a body she was holding as proof of her love to her brother, she pulled out the knife she relied on for her love and ran past her brother, lunging towards Matthew.

He met her eyes. They were bloodthirsty and filled with something that Matthew couldn't explain. It was passion, yet it didn't feel like it exactly. It was an immediate reaction for Matthew to move back from the attack, but the mysterious beauty managed to get him.

Her knife penetrated into his leg and sent pain shooting through him. The pain was excruciating and caused Matthew to cry out in pain. His blood left red stains in the pure white snow and continued to drip out of his leg. Natalia looked at her knife and saw that it was broken. The only place it could have been was inside Matthew's leg. His trouser leg was stained red and it was spreading through the material which was slowly absorbing it. The warm oozing liquid distracted Ivan for a bit, before he realized that he had found his chance to run from his crazy sister.

Abandoning Matthew, Ivan ran from the clearing. Natalia looked from the direction Ivan ran to and the injured Matthew. Following her strongest desire, she ignored Matthew and chased after her brother, leaving Matthew with a glare of warning. He knew that he had seen something he shouldn't have.

Kumajirou quickly ran out of his hiding place when she left and stood by his owner, feeling helpless. Matthew brought out some of his knowledge from school and tied his scarf around his wound which made him let out another pained cry when he applied pressure to it.

Matthew tried to stand up, but the pain was too much for him to handle and he couldn't crawl all the way to town. Even if he had tried, he was going into shock and he was falling unconscious. Kumajirou pulled him into the hiding place where he was before which was a hollow tree.

It was then, Kumajirou went to find help and got the Bad Touch Trio.

Matthew couldn't really remember anything other than that. All he remembered was hearing people and then he woke up in the hospital. Even though he couldn't remember anything, he knew he had to thank the people who saved him, but it was highly likely they would forget they even saved anyone.

"I need to give Kumasaburo a nice treat later… if he remembers where I live." Matthew mumbled as he said Kumajiro's name wrong which was just how Kumajirou sometimes forgot who Matthew was.

He sighed propped up his pillows so he could lean on them in an upright position. He hadn't been admitted to hospital before and he watched everyone as they moved about ignoring him and his now empty IV bag. There were doctors and nurses walking about scurrying to different patients.

After a few minutes of watching, Matthew heard a large group of people. It seemed like they were going to go visit someone and from what he heard there was quite a few of them. From where he was, he couldn't see the group, but he saw a nurse from the side he was on walk towards the group.

This group was those from The Town of Runaways. They received a few amount of looks from people due to the size of their group but also from the fact that they were all so different and beautiful in their own way. Each of them seemed to have the beauty of what country they were from, which truly represented them well. The people who looked on thought that the person whom they were visiting was extremely popular and outgoing to have so many unique people visit.

"Yo! We're here to see Matthew Williams- that is his second name right?" Gilbert said to the nurse as he conferred with Francis.

It took a few minutes for the nurse to realise who they were talking about until she remembered someone under that name in the ward they were in. She was a bit mesmerised by the splendour of the group and the fact that Francis was purposely looking towards her in a flirty way didn't help.

"Yes, he's over there. He came out from a surgery, so please try not to wear him out too much. Also we would request that you keep your noise level down due to the size of your group." She replied as she guided the group towards the bed where Matthew rested.

Matthew was curious to find which of the patients had all the people visiting them as he saw the group walking towards his direction. He liked watching people who had friends because he didn't have any himself. Although it was what caused him to feel depressed, it was interesting seeing people like his brother who was outgoing.

When the group was getting closer Matthew took a book from next to him which was left there by someone and read it so that he wasn't caught staring even though he wasn't usually very conspicuous. He wondered if they were visiting the person next to him and he didn't look up to see who they were.

"Mr Williams, you have visitors."

Matthew froze in shock.

He was about to say there was a mistake but when he looked up from the book and saw the group was made from people from within the Town of Runaways, he wondered if they really were there to see him. They smiled at him warmly even though a few of them didn't even know who he was. Matthew recognised all of them. He was glad to see his brother among them and was a little embarrassed to see the man he met during New Years.

The nurse left as the group spread out around his bed. It was awkward for most of them since they didn't know each other well but the Bad Touch Trio seemed comfortable. Alfred was also not as awkward as the others, as the first sentence was spoken by him.

"Did you know I'm your hero?" He asked with a proud look on his face while everyone else just stared at him unimpressed expressions.

Matthew was confused. Judging from everyone's expressions, he would have said that his brother wasn't really the person who saved him but there was a chance that he could have. He didn't know much about what happened after Kumajirou left and the looks everyone was giving his brother was probably from the fact that Alfred liked to show off a lot.

"Of course he's not. We are really!" Gilbert exclaimed as he fell back into a chair next to the bed.

Matthew's doubts were cleared as he watched as his brother scowl at the others for ruining his plan to become the hero. Alfred hated it when someone else was the centre of attention and Matthew knew it well. It was a trait which wasn't so great, but he thought it was one that made his brother who he was.

"I told you your plan wouldn't work." Arthur sneered at Alfred as Francis, Antonio and Gilbert were getting ready to explain everything.

Matthew still felt that the attention of the group wasn't really on him even though they had gone to see him there. They were all following Alfred's movements or Francis, Antonio and Gilbert's. It was just like Matthew thought-- the man he met on New Years day was popular with people.

"Well first, we found your pet and most people think we're making up the fact that it's a polar bear, but you'll confirm it right? It's a polar bear isn't it?" Antonio started excitedly while leaning closer to Matthew.

"Um, yeah." He replied uncomfortably but the answer caused Feliciano to become excited and seemed to grab Ludwig's full attention rather than half.

"Ooh~ really? I wanna see it! Isn't that good Germany? It's like Knut!" Feliciano babbled excitedly while shaking Ludwig's arm.

"I think I saw Francis with it last. He took it into his house." Yao informed as he remembered when it happened.

Matthew sighed in relief knowing that Kumajirou was safe and sheltered.

"Was the polar bear there when we were lodging at your house?" Yong Soo asked curiously, also interested in the bear in question.

"Do you think it'll be a playmate with my panda?" Yao also asked before Matthew could answer the first question.

"Hey Lovi, do you wanna see the polar bear? It's cute like you like you, you know." Antonio said to the uninterested looking Italian who was actually curious about it.

"Shut up jackass. Guys calling guys cute is just wrong. Why do you have a polar bear anyway?" he asked being the only one questioning it.

Before Matthew knew it he was being bombarded with questions about Kumajirou rather than questions regarding his health or what happened the day he was in there. As usual, he was upstaged until finally, Cuba changed the subject completely from his separate conversation with Gilbert.

"He does look like Alfred!" Cuba blurted out a little too loud during the conversation which made everyone stop their questions about Kumajirou.

They turned to Alfred before they all inspected Matthew's face with great interest trying to determine if there was any resemblance between the two. This continued for a few more moments as Cuba waited for their thoughts on it.

It was already uncomfortable having so many people around him with at least half of their attention on him, but when someone put their full attention onto him, it made him feel even worse. Matthew made this fact obvious as he backed away and refused to meet their eyes properly by instead looking at something in the background or at something which he pretended to catch his interest.

The other reason why he did it was because he didn't want to tell them that Alfred was his brother because it would seem weird if he just claimed to his brother because if only one half of the siblings said they were related while the other would be completely clueless as to who he was, it would make it seem like a big misunderstanding and since people paid attention to Alfred more often, they would think that it was Matthew who was wrong. It hurt him trying to hide the fact they were actually siblings. He had first gone to the village because he was lost after he had found his brother who had forgotten him.

As everyone continued to stare at Matthew, Elizaveta was the only one caring and attentive enough to realize he was uncomfortable with the action..

"Guys, stop for a bit!" she said in a higher volume than them, but wasn't exactly shouting in order to keep with the nurse's request.

"I'm sorry if those guys have caused you trouble. I'm Elizaveta by the way. I heard you're from our town, but I haven't seen you around." The woman with light brown hair said introducing herself.

Matthew shyly nodded and looked down, not wanting to meet with anyone's eyes. It was actually kind of scary having so many people surrounding him because he wasn't used to it.

Alfred, Arthur, Francis, Antonio, Lovino, Feliciano, Ludwig, Elizaveta, Yao, Yong Soo, "Cuba" and that man from New Years day. There were twelve people there to see him and the majority of them had never had a proper conversation with him before.

"I've actually been living there for almost five years already." He replied in a quiet tone.

A few people coughed and turned away because they were embarrassed to have not noticed him living there for so long even though they had lived there for almost the same amount of time and was even there before Matthew. Gilbert calculated the years and realized the reason why he hadn't seen Matthew before was because he was back in Germany. It brought some relief because he knew that he hadn't ignored Matthew and felt awesome for remembering him since their first meeting.

"Oh really? My country is Hungary. What's yours?" Elizaveta asked with interest and in an attempt to get Matthew more comfortable with them.

"I'm Canada." He answered in the same quiet tone.

"Ah-ha! He's Canada, and he looks like Alfred, who is America. Now who thinks they don't look like each other? They could be brothers!" Cuba asked once again, still trying to prove his point to Gilbert which was quite ironic, since they really were brothers.

Elizaveta didn't want Matthew to be uncomfortable again and was deeply apologetic as they once again proceeded to inspect Alfred and Matthew. Sighing, she walked around the bed with her hand out, so as she walked past them, she slapped all their heads. Matthew was glad that she had a big impact on them due to her being so "manly" because all of them stopped and complained about her hitting them.

Feliciano was the first to stop whining about being hit surprisingly, and was the first one to say something normal and back to the original conversation.

"Oh, sorry about that, but I'm glad your operation went smoothly! Imagine if these three didn't save you at that time!" Feliciano said cheerfully as stood in between Antonio and Gilbert and linked with their arms as Francis was on the other side of the bed.

The three of them grinned at Matthew as Alfred sulked and Arthur rolled his eyes. Matthew looked at the three of them and was surprised that they had saved him. Francis and Antonio were known to be troublemakers in the town. Matthew felt himself warm up slightly due to the happiness of the fact they helped him because he didn't expect them to actually go visit him afterwards. From what Matthew thought about Antonio and Francis, they would just be spreading their name around the girls a little bit instead of actually going to see him. However, what surprised him the most was the fact Gilbert was there too. Matthew had only met him during New Years and yet there he was, visiting Matthew. He thought about it for a few seconds before he came up with the conclusion that it was just because anyone would be concerned about someone they saved. It was best not to think so badly of people and to think about the goodness of their hearts too.

"Thank you all very much… I'm really grateful and I don't know what to do to thank you." Matthew said with a few tears trying to escape, but using his hair, he hid it from them, causing them to think he was uncomfortable again.

It was really quite frightening for him because he was stabbed in a secluded area. Even though it wasn't anywhere vital, it was still dangerous. During the time he was hiding he was thinking about when the New Year started. There was hope that something good would happen to him but instead he had fallen upon misfortune. However, for some reason, Matthew couldn't help but suddenly start thinking about the possibility that he was just starting to get a path of happiness. He thought it was a selfish thought, to take advantage of the fact he was injured and that people were visiting him, which caused him to feel bad about himself again.

Elizaveta snorted which was very unlady like, but she couldn't help it. Things in her mind worked differently to Matthew's own one.

"Bad Touch Trio being thanked for something? Does not compute." She stated while giggling.

The three of them glared at her as she tried to stifle her laughter to keep some peace in the ward. Although everyone else didn't want to admit it, they thought the same thing as her. Matthew had been in the town long enough to know what she was talking about, but he thought that they deserved to be praised on something they have finally done.

"Don't worry about paying these guys back. They don't want anything." Yao decided for them which made their faces fall.

Ludwig nodded in agreement and everyone else seemed keen on the idea too. Matthew watched in amusement as he often did before in the town. Most of the time he enjoyed watching the little banters his brother got into but eventually he grew to realize that he was so much happier without him getting in the way of his life. Afterwards, he grew to dislike listening to everyone happily speaking about things.

"But West…!" Gilbert complained to his younger brother who stood firm.

"Just consider them helping you as if though they're making up for all the trouble they've caused before." Arthur said speaking directly to Matthew as if though the three whom they were speaking about had no say.

"All in favour of that idea?" Elizaveta asked everyone as she raised her hand.

The response was obvious as all of them raised their hands either plainly or sheepishly. The Bad Touch Trio sulked as it was decided that they would not be receiving a reward for their hard work. Matthew sat in the bed and for the first time, in a long while, the feature which disappeared from his face, once again found a place to display its glory as a gentle smile formed on his lips.

Gilbert didn't overlook the fact that he hadn't cracked out a smile at all during the time they visited and was glad that the visit made him happy. Gilbert also enjoyed the visit as they ended up having onesided conversations with Matthew which were all quite amusing and all managed to keep the smile on his lips. The idea of making him the new Austria to bully disappeared from his mind as he sat with everyone talking about experiences they had with danger just as Matthew did. He wanted to make Matthew a friend if he could.

* * *

Sorry for the poorly written chapter.

A little note is that I've made Italy alternate between country names and human names a little bit to get the feeling that they are all nicknamed there. Ah, also, if I remember correctly, Canada says Kumajiro's name wrong a few times in the world baseball strips.

Ugh, I'm sick… I even had to blow off training today. I did that yesterday too. I feel bad now.


	5. Chapter 5

**I do not own hetalia**

I said I would leave on my birthday if I had nothing going on, but it's my birthday today and I'm uploading this… lol.

I have no idea why I'm writing this when I've got my SAT's exams in two days… even though the UK got rid of them, my school still does it--Sorry, here's the chapter. It sorta turned out weird. To me at least.

* * *

The hours flew by as Matthew listened to conversations feeling content rather than when he usually felt upset by them. He heard stories of them from before they joined the town and some experiences of when they did join the town. The person's story he was interested in most was Gilbert's story since he didn't know who he was. Matthew wanted at least a little background story about him.

"I used to live here but I went back home to Germany to go study some awesome birds for a bit. I guess I'm so awesome, my life has never been in danger and the only reason I have to go to hospital is to go let others bask in my awesomeness." He explained as everyone rolled their eyes sarcastically.

Matthew noted how even though he had that sort of personality, Gilbert was still popular with everyone even if they sometimes thought badly of him. It wasn't like he was hated or anything, but his mischievous personality made it so that he was able to make friends and be himself at the same time. Judging from what Elizaveta had said before about calling them "The Bad Touch Trio" Gilbert was close friends with Antonio and Francis. It made sense since he was saved by Gilbert as well.

"You guys have been talking about your own experiences, but what about his?" Lovino pointed out just of pure boredom--he just wanted another story he didn't know.

They turned to face Matthew when they realized they had forgotten him. It was just because he was so quiet, it was easy to forget his presence. Lovino only managed to remember him because he had been silently been trying to remember why he was there in the first place.

"Ah, sorry Matthew. Go on, what happened to you?" Arthur asked as everyone went silent to hear him.

Matthew wasn't so keen on speaking out to them, but nevertheless, he told them about what happened. They were surprised he knew who Ivan was but they were also shocked at the fact that Matthew had seen something like that. It was something worth reporting to the police they thought because they were sure that the case was related to the murder in the forest as well. After all, Matthew did see the girl dragging someone around with her.

"Ivan's a jerk!" Alfred exclaimed after Matthew told the story.

With such a childish reaction from a serious case, Alfred received several punches from various people, but Matthew couldn't help but hold back his chuckle. It didn't matter if his brother forgot who he was, Matthew couldn't find it in himself to ever hate his brother. Everyone else was too busy telling Alfred off but Gilbert noticed the stifled laughter and felt something strange. It was like when sometimes he sees Elizaveta with Roderich, or when it's a holiday and there are couples around. Sick? Well there was that word…jealous. However, that word wasn't in Gilbert's dictionary. Well, not to be used for him at least.

Gilbert kept wondering why he felt feelings that he normally wouldn't feel. He had first of all supposedly felt anxious, worried and somehow, jealous! There wasn't even anything for him to feel jealous over. Perhaps the fact that Matthew was giving attention to Alfred and not Gilbert was it. Both of them are always saying they are the best, and with "Denmark" saying so too, it sort of became natural when someone acknowledge one over the other. Then again, Gilbert had a though annoying him in the back of his head telling him that wasn't the case.

As the conversation drifted towards Alfred's terrible diet and Arthur's vile food, Matthew glanced at the clock and realized it was almost time for them to leave. As usual, Matthew was powerless as the conversations went on and he couldn't warn them because of his inability to say anything. All he could do was glance at the clock nervously until a nurse would come over to tell them that it was time for visitors to leave.

Ludwig noticed Matthew looking at the clock and when he looked for himself, he realized it was almost time for them to leave. Due to his own nature, he wanted to leave on time and according to schedule.

"Visiting hours are almost over. We should leave now so Markus can rest." He said in a commanding tone.

"West, it's Matthew. Remember that." Gilbert corrected while amused at his brother's embarrassed face because he had gotten the wrong name.

Everyone else got ready to leave as well with a small mumble going around as they complained about the time being over already. They had fun even though they hadn't even acknowledged Matthew properly. A few of them had managed to at least memorise his face but had small difficulties with his name. Canada was what most of them had remembered them by.

After everyone had left the hospital and went back to town to do their normal things, Matthew sat in the hospital, listening to the beeping of the machines and occasional footsteps from people wandering around at night or nurses taking night duties. While he listened, he thought about how lively it had been before when the people from town had visited.

It made him happy that they came to visit him and he thought that perhaps finally his year was going to be different that the others. What had surprised him was when they were leaving, Gilbert had managed to memorise his name and even corrected Ludwig. It had been years since he had last had his name been said correctly by someone else.

Matthew wasn't trying to over think it, but he realized that Gilbert even managed to see that he was crying during the New Year firework display. It made him happy to realize that some remembered him in such a small time. Alfred had grown up with Matthew for at least five years and somehow forgot Matthew and Gilbert spoke to Matthew for a few seconds and remembered who he was after gathering things from people he knew. Matthew had to learn about Gilbert from listening to the conversations which he didn't take part in. It was like how he knew the majority of the town.

The sky had been dark for awhile due to the season, but the lights from outside seemed to shine brighter than before as Matthew went to sleep feeling happier than when Gilbert had first recognised him. The small thought occurred to Matthew that every time he didn't feel like utter filth, Gilbert had spoken to him. He chuckled at that thought, for it seemed a bit cheesy. Gilbert brought him happiness? Not only did it sound…gay, but it was just so strange to be saying. Matthew felt uneasy after the small laugh and pushed it off by going to sleep.

* * *

It was still cold and there was still snow around, but due to the fact that everyone seemed to do something for the community, the ground where people walked on was cleared of snow and ice. Matthew held tightly onto the crutches and used them to support him as he walked to his house. It had been around a month since he was first put into the hospital.

Something which had been bothered Matthew greatly was thoughts of what Kumajirou was doing. He wondered if Francis was looking after him properly and if he was alright with other people since he still didn't recognise Matthew properly as his owner. Even though Kumajirou often had times where he would treat Matthew like he was the best in the world, there were a lot of times where he would completely forget who Matthew was. It seemed like the effect of not being recognised also worked on animals too.

Matthew saw his house a small distance away and sigh in relief. It was a nice feeling just looking at the place he called home. There wasn't anything he liked doing much, so sitting in the comfort of his home, away from where the conversations were was a relaxing thing to do. Watching the world go by everyday as he quietly travelled to the next town every morning for his small job as a part time librarian. The job suited him well, but the only problem he had was asking people to keep quiet while they were there.

Gilbert was waiting for Matthew to get back from the hospital so he could greet him. It was a much different way of how he thought he would be with Matthew. At first he wanted him to just be someone who admired him like (a very small amount of) other people, then he wanted him to be someone to bully like how he used to bully Roderich, but after visiting him a few times in the hospital he changed his choice to "undefined". Matthew was quite plainly… a plain person. Gilbert was a very bright person with a large amount of mischief with him. What didn't make sense was why Gilbert was so keen on visiting him all the time. Even Gilbert didn't understand it himself. Perhaps if he hadn't noticed that he was quite intrigued by Matthew, he would have forgotten him like everyone else, but the problem with that theory was that when he thought about it again, he just couldn't imagine anyone missing Matthew. He just stood out too much even though Gilbert _knew _that he wasn't meant to.

Just a small walk away from Matthew's house was where Gilbert had been waiting for the Canadian's arrival. As Gilbert was making his way to his house to wait for the others to meet with Matthew, he saw the person who they were meant to wait for make his way to his house before they were even there. Matthew had been walking towards the house with a slightly happy look to him rather than when he had seen him crying at first. It took a little while for Matthew to also spot Gilbert, but when he did, Gilbert waved to him lazily with a grin on his face. Matthew waved back after unhooking his arm from the crutches, only to put them back around and walk closer to Gilbert who was standing by the door of his house.

"Hey, sorry everyone's late. Unlike them, I actually remembered to come today." Gilbert informed Matthew as he came close enough to hear.

"Oh, it's okay. You didn't even need to come see me anyway." Matthew replied back quietly.

There was something that Matthew had to admit. He was starting to look up to Gilbert slightly. It was a very strange thing to say, especially after Elizaveta had told him the things that Gilbert had done before. It was just like how Matthew looked up to his brother. In fact, the reason was almost the same. Matthew wanted to be like his brother who was all amazing and noticed by everyone, but knew that he wasn't ever going to be like that at all. Gilbert was also amazing and noticed by everyone, but the thing that got to Matthew the most was that, for once, someone recognised him.

"Nah, I wanted to. Apparently everyone else did too, but I don't see anyone." He said bitterly as he thought of what to say to the others about forgetting to see Matthew.

"Well, thanks I guess… Do you want to come in?" Matthew asked while he put his keys into the door and opened it.

"Can I?" Gilbert answered with another question.

The house was clean due to Matthew having nothing better to do that clean, read or do something tedious in his spare time. Socialising wasn't much of an option for him since hardly anyone remembered him. Although sometimes Cuba went to visit him, he was busy with his work and such. At one point, South Korea and China went over to his house and stayed for a little while in cramped conditions. Eventually they got bored and left, leaving Matthew unvisited for a year or so.

Matthew held out an arm indicating Gilbert to go first while he supported his weight on the other arm holding the crutches. The instructions were followed and Gilbert walked into the small house. Everyone in the town had the same design of house. It was basically a room with a kitchen at the front and a toilet at the far side of the room, away from anywhere it might disturb normal activity. Everyone had decided it was sensible to get sofa beds as the space was limited. Other than the design and the fact they chose the same type of beds, everyone else had a different looking house. They had their own special touch. It became popular to hang a small flag of the country they were nicknamed after by the where they placed their bed after Alfred had suggested doing so.

The room had a sweet smell to it which Gilbert inhaled and savoured. The scent was quite pleasant and it suited Matthew well, for it was gentle and soft, but for some reason made a big impact on him.

As Gilbert went over and sat himself down on the sofa, Matthew shut the door and looked around his house. Even though he used to be sick of how plain he thought it was, it looked much livelier with just Gilbert sitting on his sofa. It was like he added colour to the room despite him being so pale. Perhaps what Gilbert always told him about being Awesome enough to do anything had got to him and made Matthew think differently.

"Do you want anything to eat or drink?" Matthew asked as he hung up his coat on the rack next to the door.

"Have you got any beer?" Gilbert wondered feeling the need for one.

Matthew shook his head and raised an eyebrow. It was far too early in the morning to be drinking beer. It also seemed like Gilbert had just gotten up a few hours before without eating. He was similar in the way Alfred's diet was bad as well with his normal meal being a hamburger of the sort.

"How about I make breakfast?" He suggested as he walked to the kitchen area carefully with his crutches.

Gilbert nodded in agreement as he realized that he was actually quite hungry. When Matthew was walking, he felt slightly bad as he was struggling but he saw that Matthew had a slight smile. He assumed it was from the fact that he was back in town and at home. Suddenly, Gilbert wondered if he should be visiting him or not since it would be good to let Matthew rest, however, he was far too impatient to wait another few hours before visiting again. Anyway, he didn't seem to mind and Gilbert thought that he would automatically get accepted to anywhere.

_I'm sure he doesn't mind._ He thought to himself.

Gilbert stood up and too his coat off to hang on the coat rack. Normally he wouldn't care about helping out anyone in the kitchen of their house if he was the guest, but since Matthew was injured, he made an acceptation for him. The problem was however; Gilbert couldn't cook very well. It wasn't like England or Finland's cooking, but it was either bland or too strong.

Matthew saw Gilbert walking into the small kitchen pulling the sleeves of his shirt up like he was going to help, but he immediately attempted to push Gilbert out of the kitchen. The problem with that though, was the fact that Matthew only had one leg which could support him well and the push was weak due to him having to focus on not falling over by holding onto the crutches. Gilbert was amused by it for a few seconds as Matthew tried to shoo him out. He cackled at the attempts.

"I'm just too good to be moved." He claimed as Matthew almost pouted- but he didn't, because he was a grown man.

Gilbert saw the almost pouting face and laughed some more. He was right. Matthew was interesting to be around. It was good he didn't bully him like he was planning to. Even though Matthew was reserved, Gilbert couldn't help but find himself attracted to his presence. Gilbert felt weird after thinking the words "attracted" since it felt like he was saying he liked Matthew in a different way. It felt wrong to him.

Matthew wanted to prove Gilbert wrong by at least trying to move him slightly and tried to catch him off guard. However, Matthew himself wasn't ready for the surprise attack and slipped, almost falling to the tiled floor and injuring himself again. However as he thought he was going to fall, Gilbert quickly caught him by holding him up by one of his arms.

"Whoa, easy there." Gilbert warned as he helped Matthew up properly with both arms.

His strong arms pulled Matthew to a standing position as he felt embarrassed at the fact he failed to push him and managed to almost fall over. That also made it the third time he had helped him. Gilbert laughed at Matthew again but Matthew learnt not to try another surprise attack on him.

"It just show's how great I am." Gilbert said, praising himself once again.

"Narcissist." Matthew mumbled while making sure Gilbert heard him.

"Oi…oi…" He replied as he punched Matthew's arm lightly.

Over the time Gilbert had been visiting Matthew, it seemed that he had become more comfortable with him than the other people from town since Gilbert often directed questions and conversations towards him. It even shocked Matthew that he had playfully insulted Gilbert who replied in a similar matter. In Matthew's head, he was slowly wondering if Gilbert could be considered a friend yet. The only other friend who wasn't Kumajirou was Cuba, and unlike Gilbert, he couldn't recognise Matthew straight away.

In the end, Gilbert decided not to help make breakfast as he made things slightly harder for Matthew who seemed capable of cooking while somehow supporting himself with only one leg or while holding onto his crutches. Gilbert had sat down and watched Matthew instead of turning on the small TV. It was obvious in Matthew mind what he was going to make as he missed pancakes.

"It's done…" Matthew announced as he saw Gilbert already knew for he was staring.

Gilbert walked over and helped Matthew take the plates to the small table in the main part of the room. The pancakes were still hot, so when Gilbert cut it, a small amount of steam gentle wafted out. The small slice of fluffy cake was on his fork, about to go into his mouth when Matthew had seen enough and stood up to go find his maple syrup.

"How can you eat like that? You need maple syrup!" He insisted, quite worked up about the fact Gilbert had actually liked them plain.

Gilbert wondered what he was talking about. Matthew walked back with a bottle of maple syrup. Matthew didn't even ask if Gilbert wanted it or not, but he just squeezed it onto the pancakes.

"It'll bring you happiness." He stated afterwards.

Gilbert just shrugged his shoulders and ate the pancakes disregarding Matthew's claim, for he didn't believe it, but when he tasted them, his eyes were opened. Gilbert had fallen in love. Maple syrup was beautiful. An idea came to Gilbert which he thought could bind him with maple syrup. He would bring it up after he ate. It was too beautiful to stop eating.

Matthew ate happily knowing that he made someone fall in love with maple syrup as well. It was worth not resting if he managed to get someone like it too. Some people just didn't appreciate it, so the claim of bringing happiness worked on Gilbert at least.

When they finished, Gilbert picked up the plates and brought them to the kitchen. He would have washed them, but he couldn't be bothered to do something which meant work like that. It didn't matter to him. All he wanted was a special something.

"Hey Mattie…" Gilbert asked in a suspiciously nice kind of tone.

Matthew noticed it was the first time he had been called Mattie since Alfred used to when they were children. It made him feel like he really was Gilbert's friend.

"As my reward for saving you… can I have that weird stuff you gave me all the time? It's freaking tasty!" He exclaimed as he put the plates into the sink.

Matthew nodded for giving away maple syrup was fine and it made him feel better because he got to reward Gilbert. Gilbert cheered as he was allowed a delicious gift of both maple syrup and the taste of a friendship with Matthew. In due time, it would probably even taste better than maple syrup itself. Although both of them may have disagreed before the time actually came.

* * *

Okay, the latter part of the chapter lack quality due to me being very sleepy and wanting to get it up now since I can't later in the month. sorry it's short and worse than last time. Please forgive any tiny mistakes in the writing. I spotted a few in each chapter of this so far.


	6. Chapter 6

I do not own hetalia.

Yay end of year exams are DONE WITH! Only seven more weeks of school…

Random note: We (friends) went to London Tombs for fun and were the only British born ones there. Everyone was foreign lol.

Also, is Gilbert allowed to swear at this rating?

Here's the next chapter~!

* * *

_Who did I want to save?_

The question continued to ring through his mind. It was ever since Feliciano asked him about it. Even though he tried to be normal, whenever he was alone at home, Alfred always thought back to the question Feliciano asked him.

"_Who did you need to save?"_

The question continued to bug Alfred. Even though he had concluded that it was because he just saw it on TV, something felt wrong. It wasn't the real answer. The real answer was hidden somewhere he just didn't know. There was no reason as to why the question should have bothered him so much, but he felt like he couldn't just leave it alone. There was something special about the person he wanted to save, but what was it? _Who_ was it?

There was loud shouting from outside, which distracted Alfred from his thoughts. The voices were easy distinguished by him as Francis and Arthur. It seemed like they were having another of their fights. The thoughts of "who Alfred needed to save" disappeared as he grabbed a coat from the chair next to him (where it was last dumped) and went outside to see his friends.

"Hey guys! I'm here because I have nothing better to do~! Entertain me!" Alfred demanded as he flew out of his house and to catch up with Francis and Arthur.

* * *

Matthew tried hard to listen to everything Gilbert was saying to him, but even though he was really determined to listen, it was hard to concentrate. Gilbert was telling him about a bunch of different things he had done to various different people and a lot of them involved Roderich. Other than hearing things like "And then that freak Eli hit me with her frying pan" and "I'm awesome right?" everything else was hard to hear. Matthew's eyes were dropping ever so slightly and he tried to make sure Gilbert didn't notice he was falling asleep because it would be slightly insulting as it would be like saying he was boring.

Unfortunately, Matthew finally let his eyes drop and let himself fall asleep as Gilbert was walking around the room complaining with great vigour. It took a full ten minutes for Gilbert to realize that Matthew had fallen asleep, with the reason as to how he noticed was due to the tiniest little snore that came from Matthew as a reply to a question.

Gilbert turned from the area he was pacing around in and saw Matthew had fallen asleep in a sitting position. It looked quite uncomfortable since his neck was in an awkward position. It was also cold inside the house because it had started to snow slightly outside again. Matthew didn't even shiver in his sleep. He didn't mind the cold weather.

The sunlight from outside was bright due to the snow reflecting it brightly. It shone in through the windows and gently into the silent house- minus Matthew's tiny breaths and the steady ticking of a single clock. Gilbert felt at peace inside the house when it was silent. It was hardly silent in his house. He usually didn't like it like that, but suddenly it was nice to have a calm atmosphere and Matthew's serene face in slumber made him feel tranquil.

Gilbert decided to put Matthew into a more comfortable position and walked over to do so. Carefully, he picked him up slowly and put him into another chair as he reassembled the sofa into its bed form. After doing so, he went to pick Matthew up again, who stirred slightly, but went back to sleep, feeling comfortable in his bed where he was placed.

Normally, Gilbert would have woken up anyone who fell asleep while he was speaking to them to make them listen to the rest of what he was saying, but he only let Feliciano and his brother, Ludwig do so, so far. Collapsing into a chair, Gilbert realized that Matthew was another with the privilege of that, which Gilbert himself found strange. He hadn't even let Antonio sleep while he spoke to him and they had been friends for a long while.

When he remembered Antonio, Gilbert remembered that everyone else was meant to see Matthew as well, but they had forgotten about it. Everyone had gone to see Matthew at least twice after the first visiting session they had, yet somehow, they managed to forget the date that he would be coming back to the town. Gilbert felt special because he was the only to remember, but he was annoyed that nobody else did either.

"Well, I guess my awesomeness makes up for the numbers…"He mumbled as Matthew continued to sleep.

It was kind of awkward since the owner of the house was sleeping and Gilbert had only made friends with Matthew through small conversations within, what? Just a month? Even so, Gilbert hadn't gone to see him everyday, so they were friends, but not super close friends, yet not one of those people you say hello to whenever you see each other.

Gilbert considered leaving the house, but that would be like running away. Gilbert never ran away. Unless it was Vash when he was angry. Or Elizaveta. Well it wasn't that type of running away anyway, Matthew might think it would be Gilbert running away from him because he didn't like him and Gilbert didn't mind him. In fact, he liked him because he was interesting. Interesting because he wasn't interesting. Which was very confusing, yet made sense. A lot of things in Gilbert contradicted each other.

Thinking too much was annoying, but there was nothing Gilbert could do. He considered drawing on Matthew's face while he slept. It was an interesting idea, but Gilbert had to wait a little longer for them to become closer before he would do something like that, because he was determined to make Matthew his friend, and if he drew on his face, it was likely he would become upset and not want to be Gilbert's friend anymore.

However, not matter how determined he was, there was nothing that could stop his own mischievous nature coming out.

So, there he stood, with non-permanent, water based ink marker in his hand, ready to draw on Matthew's face with. Gilbert hadn't drawn on anyone's face in a long while and he was excited to draw on a new face. The way he treated faces was; drawing a doodle on a person in the newspaper. It was natural and it usually came out looking either really great or hilarious. Gilbert took the lid off the pen and slowly brought the pen to Matthew's face.

_Should I? _

Closer.

_Should I not?_

It was too late. He drew on Matthew's face and his hand just wouldn't stop. The lines flowed swiftly as he glided the pen on the pale face. Fortunately, Matthew was in a deep sleep and managed to remain asleep until Gilbert had finished drawing. Inside, Gilbert wanted him to wake up and make him stop, but he knew that further in his mind, he didn't care and was enjoying it.

The trouble maker took a step back from the bed and looked at his work. There were a few mistakes here and there, but overall, he thought it was great. After staring for a few more seconds, Gilbert started to finally laugh. It first came out as a smile and eventually turned into a chuckle. Soon he was suppressing his laughter in the kitchen corner.

"Too funny!" He managed to splutter out in laughter

Matthew continued to sleep, unaware of what Gilbert had done to him. He turned away slightly so that Gilbert could finally go back and look at Matthew because his face wouldn't be showing. After laughing a tiny bit more, Gilbert sighed. After getting a good laugh out of that, there was nothing left to laugh at and Gilbert was once again bored.

Taking a mini-self-guided tour around Matthew's abode to pass time, Gilbert couldn't help but pull out a few random books from the bookshelf at the end of the room. Taking the book which had the most attractive cover, he flicked through the book without bending the cover or the spine in case Matthew was like Ludwig and hated when he books ended up like that. When he flicked through the whole book, he put it back in the wrong place on the bookshelf with a sigh. Gilbert had a childish habit of not trying hard enough to reading books without pictures in them, and to his dismay, none of the books had pictures in them.

The books did however, have small sticky notes from Matthew attached to the back of each book and sometimes, inside the book itself. Gilbert read over the slightly negative and sarcastic comments which Matthew made about the books about family reunions and such. There were a few positive ones of light humour books and the fantasy ones, but the family related ones seemed to be all negative.

From the few weeks of friendship that Gilbert and Matthew had, Gilbert found out that sometimes, Matthew wasn't as shy as he thought he was and sometimes a tiny bit bitter, but would sigh and say that there was nothing he could do about whatever caused him to react so bitterly. It was quite the opposite of Gilbert.

Gilbert sat on the floor to look at the book near the bottom of the bookcase. He noticed that they were all journals and books to be written in. He remembered his own library of diaries and wondered if they were as great as his. While he looked at the labelled diaries, address books and such to examine if it was so, one caught his eye. There was a dark blue book with the words "Birthdays" inscribed intricately on the spine. Gilbert's pale hand reached out for the book and pull it out from its place. After he had pulled it out, a small pen dropped from behind it. It was left there with the book specifically.

Picking up the pen as well, Gilbert opened the book and flicked through the pages. There were a quite a few dates which Matthew had added. Whenever he was around and heard that it was someone's birthday, he would go home and write their name in his book. The book contained both real birthdays and the "Nation birthdays". Some people however shared the same birthday as their country's national day and some didn't even have a national day.

Gilbert decided to put his name in the book since he wasn't there yet. He took the pen's lid off and brought the pen to the paper, then wondered if his writing would ruin the book. It was filled with Matthew's handwriting and Gilbert saw his writing was quite different. After thinking for a few seconds more, he wrote his name in anyway. He stared at the page triumphantly and then decided to look through the book properly.

After passing several months, he finally reached July. There were quite a few birthdays there, but the one which stood out was Matthew's. On the 1st of July, was written _"Our Birthday (real)"._ Gilbert wondered who the other person was since it said "our". There were other birthdays listed under the 1st of July as well, so it must have been someone significant to be written as "our".

A small shuffling distracted Gilbert and caused him to look towards the bed where Matthew was sleeping. A small yawn escaped Matthew's mouth as he sat up and stretched out. Gilbert put the book and pen away carefully, not wanting to bend any pages or covers while doing so. He then got up off the wooden floor and went over to Matthew.

"Hey sleepy head." Gilbert greeted holding back his laughter as he saw Matthew's face again.

Realizing that he had fallen asleep while Gilbert was talking, Matthew felt guilty. Moreover, Gilbert had taken his time to go see him after he had saved him from bleeding to death or from infection from the blade stuck in his leg. Thinking over all the things that Gilbert had done and what Matthew did by falling asleep, he felt even worse. It felt like he couldn't do anything right.

"I'm sorry! I'm really sorry!" Matthew said frantically as he kicked the sheets off with his good leg and made his bed.

"No problem. Keeping your eyes open while with me is hard since they sometimes can't handle me." Gilbert replied with a wide grin, barely keeping his laugh in.

After Matthew carefully put away the bed, he turned back to Gilbert wondering what to do next. He figured that Gilbert must have been bored out of his mind being with him. Matthew didn't know how to keep a person entertained because he usually didn't have anyone who would speak with him. Even though Matthew wasn't doing anything, he noticed that Gilbert was extremely amused. He was about to start laughing, but Matthew had not idea what he was going to laugh about.

"I give up!" Gilbert yelled as he let himself laugh again at his work as Matthew could only wonder he was laughing about.

* * *

Matthew followed Gilbert around sheepishly as he went on his rampage of knocking on doors and yelling at the person living there. It was hard enough having to follow Gilbert around when he was moving so fast, but in the snow and with crutches was even harder. However, even so, Matthew managed it.

"It's fine you know… I'm used to it." He tried to tell Gilbert who simply ignored him, but on purpose, unlike everyone else in life.

"It's been two hours. _Two hours_ since the agreed meeting time." Gilbert said through gritted teeth.

After Matthew washed his face of the doodles Gilbert left on his face, Gilbert insisted they go find the others who said they would go see Matthew. They had completely forgotten about it, but Gilbert was the only one worked up. It had become a normal thing in life to be ignored, treated badly or forgotten for Matthew, but Gilbert would never accept it.

Matthew felt embarrassed by being with Gilbert. He thought that he and Gilbert were just two people who just wouldn't be able to be friends. In fact, he thought that nobody could be his friend. Being a burden meant that you couldn't become someone's friend, yet somehow, Matthew felt a small amount of himself thinking that maybe Gilbert was proving it wrong.

"Where the hell is Francis?" Gilbert yelled in a frustrated way as he banged on his door with his fist, with no reply.

"He might be out with Kumaemon…" Matthew whispered to himself, forgetting Kumajirou's real name for a bit.

Matthew stood around for a few minutes as they stood at the front door. The snow was still around town, piled up at the sides and melted in walking areas. Matthew looked at the gray dark spots of snow that had infected the pure white areas of fluffy fields of it. He mused on the fact that it seemed a little bit like him and everyone else. He was destroying things which should be perfect, just by being there. Even though he wasn't noticeable, he still managed to ruin it.

Gilbert had taken out his phone to try tracking down Francis. They had already gone to Antonio and chewed him out about forgetting, which meant that Francis was probably with someone else. Matthew thought to himself about who Francis might have been with. He knew most of the people in the town and their relations with other people and it was likely that Francis was with Arthur. They often fought, but they were still friends in a way. After figuring out that where he was likely to be, Matthew decided not to tell Gilbert because he felt sorry to all the people he was disturbing. If he hadn't been so forgettable, they wouldn't all have to be told off by Gilbert. Yet again, he had caused such a thing.

"That gaytard. He isn't picking up." Gilbert muttered as he thought of all the other people who were meant to go see Matthew and who they hadn't seen yet.

Gilbert stormed off to another part of the town while Matthew followed without complaining as much as before, knowing that he was going to be ignored until Gilbert was satisfied. There wasn't much he could since Gilbert was just so overpowering and Matthew's lack of presence made it so he was naturally a quiet person.

Gilbert sang a song which seemed to have been his own compostion.

"I was really awesome today too~! Roar across the world, my song that is written by me, for me~!" He sang as Matthew questioned the lyrics.

"Gilbert, can you shut up? I was enjoying my day but then I heard you were going around—oh my goodness, I'm so sorry!"

Matthew and Gilbert turned to the familiar sounding voice. Elizaveta was standing behind them with a shocked expression as her eyes were widened when she realised that she too, had forgotten about Matthew returning home from hospital. For once, she actually saw sense in Gilbert's actions. Matthew smiled at her, as she was thinking of a way to apologize. It had just completely slipped her mind. She walked closer to Matthew, who was supporting himself using his elbows on his crutches. The young woman took Matthew's hands in her own femininely soft ones and looked him deeply in the eyes. The action took him by surprise and Matthew struggled to look back at her. He wasn't used to having attention on him.

"I'm really, _really, _sorry Canada!" Elizaveta said apologetically, with a sincere tone. Her hazel green eyes bore into Matthew with her sincerity.

"Umm… It's uh, okay… I'm u-used to it." Matthew stuttered out as he slowly tried to pull away from Elizaveta without offending her.

Gilbert found Matthew's shocked reaction slightly amusing, but didn't like the fact that Elizaveta was kissing up to Matthew and saying sorry. That meant he didn't get to lecture her about how he was awesome for remembering because she already said sorry for forgetting.

Matthew finally managed to pull out of Elizaveta's grasp gently as she continued to stare at him apologetically. She wondered what he meant by "I'm used to it."

"His real name's Matthew if you don't remember." Gilbert staged whispered to her, completely changing her attitude.

Before Gilbert knew what was going on, he felt himself being chocked in a headlock. Elizaveta's face was slightly red from embarrassment. Matthew was such a normal name and she managed to forget it. Guilt kept piling on her.

"Argh! You're just so annoying! I didn't need you to remind me about that! I knew already. Also, I heard from Roderich that you were disturbing the peace around that area by banging on your brother's door and complaining about something stupid! Also…"

"I'm sorry."

Both Gilbert and Elizaveta paused, and looked over to Matthew, confused. The grip around Gilbert's neck was released and he fell to the ground, swearing as he was wet from a puddle of melted snow. Elizaveta kicked him to be quiet, wondering what Matthew was saying sorry for.

"I'm sorry." He repeated and turned to walk to the opposite direction of where the two were standing.

Gilbert watched in confusion. Matthew's face was so different. He looked just like he did when he first met him. Just when Gilbert thought he was starting to cheer up a little. Before, he thought Matthew looked happier. It couldn't be explained as happy, but it was more like a normal, content mood. Then, suddenly, he saw Matthew go back to sad. Gilbert couldn't stand up and follow Matthew because he was just, so confused.

They watched as he walked into a crowded area of the town and blended into them, disappearing from their sight.

Elizaveta thought about what she had said and thought that maybe she had said something to offend him. Her friendship with Matthew wasn't going to go anywhere if she kept doing things like that. She remembered her words and thought perhaps when she said "complaining about something stupid" Matthew took offense. She didn't mean to, it just came out by accident, but she didn't think about him that way at all. Overall, she thought that Matthew was a nice person.

"Man, this is all your fault!" She complained and ran to apologize once again to Matthew.

Gilbert didn't bother responding, but stood up a few minutes after Elizaveta left.

Matthew's face lingered in his mind.

"What the fuck is _wrong_ with me?" He thought out loud, in a frustrated manner, as he went home to change and dry off.

* * *

Matthew went through the town, hoping that he wouldn't see Gilbert or Elizaveta anytime soon. All he had wanted, was to be noticed, but Matthew took that wish back. He caused more trouble for people when he was noticed. He felt selfish for ever feeling happy that people spoke to him. There wasn't ever a time where Matthew felt good about himself. Even when he was a child, he thought that he was the problem of his family.

After he had been noticed by Gilbert, he was finally noticed by a few others, but because he wasn't very memorable, he caused trouble because Gilbert felt sorry for Matthew and told off everyone who forgot him. Matthew would have rather been not noticed than cause trouble.

Matthew continued to skulk around the town, not bothering to go home, wondering if he should go out of town to avoid seeing Gilbert or Elizaveta, but reconsidered when he thought about the risk. Normally, Matthew would go into the small café, but he heard from Gilbert before that he often went there. There wasn't much for Matthew to do but to wander around, however he was growing weary of having to walk everywhere with crutches.

Near the centre of the town, there were a few benches where people would hang around, but no-one was sitting outside. The benches were cleared of snow but they were slightly wet. It didn't matter to Matthew, as long as he was on his own and he could rest.

He slowly walked towards the damp benches and sighed in relief when he sat down. The bench he sat on was the one most hidden from view when a person walked down the path, but he could see everyone who walked by. The sky was dull and cover with clouds, but it was still light outside. There were a few parts of the sky that weren't covered in a thick blanket of grey, and small trickles of light would shine down upon the ground, but they were soon covered up by it too.

It had been at least half an hour since he suddenly left Gilbert and Elizaveta when he saw him.

Alfred.

After the first visit to the hospital, his brother couldn't be bothered to see him anymore. Matthew hadn't seen his brother since then, and was a mixture of both happy and sad when he saw him. Seeing his brother was probably a few of the things that gave him that warm happy feeling, but seeing him in the town made him feel guilty. He knew his brother could be better off. If Alfred had been an only child, he could have been happier with the Jones family, but Matthew had to ruin it. He was the second twin and brought them grief, splitting up the family. Yet, even thought Alfred was in the Town of Runaways, he looked happy. He had friends and was popular. Matthew wondered why he even left their father's house.

Matthew watched as Alfred, Arthur and Francis were arguing over what they were going to eat and wanted to smile when he saw Kumajirou in Alfred's arms. Two of his favourite things together. It was much better seeing Kumajirou with Alfred. He looked so much more livelier and Alfred seemed to like Kumajirou too.

"Hamburgers!" Alfred yelled and had no shame in pouting like a child.

"No!" Both Arthur and Francis replied, annoyed at Alfred's bad diet.

Matthew watched on, as they continued to discuss what to eat. A few more minutes into the conversation, Kumajirou sniffed the air and wriggled out of Alfred's arms, stopping the discussion on lunch. They watched as the polar bear ran towards the benches. The three of them followed the bear and saw Matthew picking it up. He held Kumajirou tightly, missing his dear friend. The warmth from the bear's body comforted Matthew in their small reunion.

"Hey it's you!" Alfred stated, pointing at Matthew hugging Kumajirou who was previous in his own arms.

Arthur and Francis remembered what they were meant to be doing that day and just like Elizaveta, they felt guilty for forgetting. When they saw Matthew, they automatically thought that he looked lonely, and it was their fault for forgetting. Alfred, who didn't know in the first place, went and sat down next to Matthew.

"I remember seeing you at hospital once! I guess you're better now huh?" Alfred asked with a smile on his face.

Matthew felt weird. He suddenly wanted to be noticed again. He enjoyed it again. Even though just a few moments ago, he was complaining about how he didn't want to be noticed by people. It was natural for Matthew to want to be noticed by his brother. Even though he didn't even know about them being related, he was glad that he got noticed by him. Matthew wondered what he really wanted. To be noticed? Or to be left alone?

Matthew nodded his head gently as Arthur and Francis slowly approached him. The arrival of the other two, reminded Alfred of their previous conversation and he interrupted Arthur as he was about to apologize to Matthew.

"So… for lunch, what would you prefer to eat, Hamburgers or some other stuff? Well who wants to eat that when-" Alfred half asked his brother before he was interrupted.

"Excuse me, I was about to speak." Arthur disrupted Alfred just like how he was.

"Umm…If it's about forgetting about me, that's fine…" Matthew said quietly with his head down as he looked at Kumajirou.

"No it isn't." Francis replied as he felt sorry for Matthew.

Alfred was confused and lost in the conversation and was wondering what they were talking about. All he wanted was to eat his hamburgers and take his mind off things which were annoying him. Such as the question that rang through his head all the time.

"I know, you can come over to my house and I can make you something to eat!" Arthur suggested which got an immediate reaction from Francis.

"He just got back from hospital and you're trying to send him back. What is wrong with you?" Francis asked angrily, protecting Matthew's stomach.

The two had an argument about Arthur's food, forgetting Matthew again. Alfred didn't bother listening to the quarrel, but stared at Matthew instead. It occurred to him that Matthew was actually slightly familiar, but he couldn't quite grasp what it was. He had to admit, Cuba was slightly right in mistaking Matthew for himself. He could see the similarities between them. Matthew was too busy staring at Kumajirou's eyelashes to realize his brother was staring at him.

"Hey." Alfred said to get Matthew's attention.

He responded by turning away from his pet/best friend and looking at his long lost brother.

"Wanna hang out?" He asked with a grin.

* * *

Yet again, finished the ending late and slightly rushed. Sorry for poor quality.

Hetalia's new ending? I'm not too sure about it… I need to listen to it some more. Ah, Hetalia's movie came out~!

Thanks for waiting every month. Should I try to make this bi-weekly? The problem is, I'm not that active on here anymore. Or should there not be a scheduled release? Well if that happened, then updates would never come.


	7. Chapter 7

I don't own hetalia

I suck at bi-weekly. This was meant to be released last month.

This failed BADLY. I'm not active with my writing anymore. This may go unfinished -.-''

It's half the size of the last chapter... sorry!

Please find a way to enjoy this chapter!

* * *

"Wanna hang out?" Alfred asked with a grin.

Matthew stared at his brother for a few seconds, completely forgetting how to speak. He was clearly saying yes to himself, but the words wouldn't come out. It was literally a dream come true for Matthew. Finally after years of dreaming, he found it coming into reality. His thoughts stopped when he wondered if he was allowed to speak to Alfred. There was no denying it, Matthew loved his brother, but he wondered if he was allowed to right to even be called his brother. Alfred didn't remember him, so it was obvious that they just weren't even meant to be friends.

"_If I don't reply, he'll think I'm weird…" _Matthew thought, afraid.

Luckily, Alfred didn't bother waiting for a proper reply, and went on to speak, much to the delight of Matthew.

"Let's go eat. It's got to be hamburgers right? I'm hungry. Are you hungry?" He asked.

Matthew didn't want to disturb his afternoon with his friends, but Francis and Arthur weren't even bothered, as once again, they were fighting, with the subjects of the argument changing every two seconds. Yet again, not waiting for an answer, Alfred began to talk.

"You know, your polar bear is cool. Where did you find it? Well I want a pet. I've always felt like getting a pet whale you know. Ah, but why have a pet when you can have an alien as your best friend? If I get an alien best friend I'll name him Tony." Alfred carried on looking at Matthew for a reaction.

Matthew stared yet again, but in amusement. He felt a little twitch, realizing it was him trying to stop smiling at his brother. Before he could try thinking about what trouble he caused earlier in the day, he found himself snicker slightly until I was a small laugh.

Arthur and Francis stopped fighting to see what Matthew was laughing at, for they didn't think he was the type to laugh at anything that wasn't funny. Alfred however, pretended to be offended by the laughter.

"What's so funny about that?" He questioned Matthew who felt more open to answer, rather than forgetting to speak to his brother.

"I'm just thinking about how stupid it sounds." He muttered quietly, not being too bold about things yet.

"What's all this then?" Arthur asked, joining the conversation, feeling the urge to also make fun out of Alfred.

As soon as Francis and Arthur rejoined the conversation, Matthew faded into the background of the conversation and Alfred's attention was somewhere else. Matthew wondered if he had forgotten the offer he had given. It was likely since from listening to Alfred for a few years, Matthew could tell that Alfred often forgot things quickly when something more interesting came into light. Matthew listened to the conversation of the three, temporarily forgetting about the morning and trying to avoid Elizaveta and Gilbert. Kumajirou sat contently on Matthew's lap.

When Matthew thought that they had forgotten about them, Alfred turned around to Matthew and made direct eye contact with him as he spoke, clearly showing that it was Matthew.

"Wanna come eat with us?" Alfred invited as he looked at Matthew's face, feeling slightly nostalgic.

The other two turned as Matthew nodded shyly, feeling happy that his brother was including him in his day out. The guilt which he should have felt was suppressed. There was a special thing about Alfred which made Matthew want to be noticed again. Matthew forgot all about Gilbert as he gave his brother a tiny smile.

The clouds still covered the sky and it was dull out. From the weather they had in the morning which had a bit of sunshine, they didn't expect hail. When it started to pelt down on them, the four of them stood up from the bench, thinking about the timing. Matthew couldn't run to shelter, but he managed fine as he followed the others to a small burger joint, which Alfred had slyly led them to.

"Well, well, I guess we'll just have to eat here…" Alfred said walking to the counter to order some food.

Matthew wasn't really that hungry but he decided to get something to eat anyway. After all, it wasn't often that he got invited out by his brother. The food didn't bother him as much as it did with the others who complained about the food choice but they all ended up eating in the end. During the time they sat together, Matthew disappeared to the background as the others spoke and ate, but Alfred kept noticing him every now and again and giving him a warm smile which Matthew couldn't help but return for a few seconds.

The attention Matthew got from Alfred and the attention he got from Gilbert felt different for some reason. Perhaps it was because Alfred was more significant in his life than Gilbert, but he had thought to himself before that they were both the same. Gilbert was the first one to properly remember him, yet Matthew didn't want his attention anymore because it caused too much trouble for everyone when Matthew was remembered. It was different with Alfred because… just because.

Guilt prevented Matthew from eating anymore. He felt so bad saying that he wanted to be noticed by Alfred but not Gilbert. It was also because he had left Gilbert after he had done so much for Matthew already. He visited him when he was in hospital, he waited for him to return home, he remembered Matthew and even made a few people recognise him too.

Alfred looked up to give Matthew the occasional glance he would normally give and saw that Matthew was staring down, not eating or playing attention to anything around him. The déjà vu hit again. Looking at Matthew made him think that he had seen him before, way before he had joined The Town of Runaways.

"If you're not eating can I have that?" Alfred asked Matthew

Matthew looked up at his brother leaning over to take Matthew's unfinished food.

"Hey, he didn't say that he was done yet! Give it back!" Arthur complained as he slapped the back of Alfred's head.

Matthew looked at both of them and then Francis who was beside him. They all had a strange bond of friendship. It wasn't all that wet mushy friendship, but more of a companionship between them. They helped each other when serious times came, but most of the time, they were just there having fun with each other and keeping each other company, while not showing that they cared for each other. Matthew longed for that type of friendship but knew he wasn't allowed to have it.

"It's okay, I don't really feel hungry anymore." Matthew said trying to make it seem like he was fine.

Francis was watching Matthew and wondering about him again. He of course received several texts and voice mails from Gilbert asking where he was just a little before Kumajirou found Matthew on the bench. Gilbert seemed really worked up about the fact that everyone except him had forgotten about visiting him. Matthew wasn't with Gilbert anymore, so something had happened. Why was Gilbert so worked up about it? It still bothered Francis.

"Well shall we get going after the pig finishes eating everything?" Francis asked after a deep sigh from the question in his head.

They waited as Alfred contently ate Matthew's food. It didn't take very long for him to finished, but they ended up having to stay inside due to the owner asking them to. They didn't want to let the four of them go outside in the hail, so they were allowed to stay until it let up.

"I'm bored." Alfred stated as he sat with his head on the table, hoping the hail would just hurry up and leave.

Matthew was fine with being stuck inside. He often sat in the café he visited most days and watched the world go by. Normal people would be bored by doing that, but Matthew was able to appreciate it unlike a lot of other people. The main reason why he could so was because he often did so even when he was little. After he was dragged from his home, he lived with his grandmother and didn't have any friends in his new school. Alfred was there to play with him either. It was a very lonely time for Matthew, so the only thing he could really do was look outside and watch the world go by, as he often did even when he was older.

He watched he hail fall and the windows inside the restaurant grow misty. Even when he couldn't see outside anymore, he didn't mind. Alfred's eyes weren't on the windows. They followed Matthew as he wondered why he felt familiar even though they hardly knew each other. Alfred had only seen him around recently and was shocked to find out from Francis that apparently he had been living there for a few good years. He didn't even know Matthew's name or what country he was given. Alfred continued to watch while pretending to listen to the others. As he watched, he saw Matthew's expression change slightly.

Kumajirou nudged Matthew from underneath the table. He looked down and saw that he had woken up. It surprised Matthew that Kumajirou was even allowed inside, but he guessed that he must have been in there a few times before because one of the young waiters kept looking at Kumajirou when he was asleep as if though he wanted to play with him when he was woke up or something. Kumajirou nudged Matthew again and the movement was felt by everyone. They all looked down to see Kumajirou climbing onto Matthew's lap and making himself comfortable in his arms.

"That's a loyal friend of yours." Arthur stated while watching Kumajirou rest yet again. (Much to the disappointment of the waiter waiting to play with him)

Matthew was too shy to meet Arthur's gaze, or anyone else's, so his eyes remained looking down on his lap at Kumajirou as he nodded. His chest went in and out as he breathed, causing Matthew's lap to tickled slightly as he felt the slight movements.

"I know right? I heard that he lead everyone to you!" Alfred exclaimed in an amazed manner.

"It was Gilbert who spotted him first. I would have never imagined that he would have led us to Matthew here." Francis added to the conversation.

Matthew jumped slightly at Francis's words. He realized that his name was said correctly and not forgotten. Although the moment was special, for some reason Matthew was more affected by when Gilbert had remembered his name. They met fewer times than the others and he remembered first.

Matthew sighed again. He was thinking about Gilbert again.

That face. It was stuck in his head.

* * *

Gilbert laid on his back on his bed, looking up to the ceiling, but with his arm covering his eyes from too much light. He got home wet and cold because of Elizaveta, but she didn't care. She went to find Matthew instead. It had taken a long hot bath to calm himself down enough to not go breaking things around his house. The heat from the bath relaxed him slightly, but he was still slightly annoyed.

Normally, Gilbert would be annoyed to be left like that, but instead, he was annoyed at the fact that Matthew's face wouldn't leave his head. It looked so pitiful and sad. When he first saw Matthew, he was crying, when he next saw him, he was in pain. Finally, he saw him again and for a small amount of time, he looked content. Suddenly he just went back to being depressed. All those faces were stuck in Gilbert's head and he didn't want them there.

It was weird. No-one had ever been like with him. He didn't remember his parents when he walked out on his family. He didn't even remember his parents' faces. They were probably all as sad as Matthew, but he didn't give a damn. Gilbert didn't even remember what Ludwig's reaction was like when he announced he was leaving.

Gilbert's stomach rumbled, making him forget his anger and move onto a subject of looking for food. Slowly, he dragged himself up and off the bed to go to his fridge. As he expected, there was nothing in there to satisfy his hunger. It was almost empty minus a few bottles of water. That was all there was.

The growl from his stomach came back again. Yet again, Gilbert's mind strayed to Matthew as he remembered that in the morning he was given food from him. It was a nice breakfast. Probably the nicest he had in while and he even managed to get Matthew to agree to give him some maple syrup as a gift.

"Why is he so upset?" Gilbert asked himself in a frustrated matter as Matthew reappeared in his head.

Gilbert didn't want to bother going to buy food due to the fact he heard his window being pelted with hailstones. There was nothing else for Gilbert to do but stay inside his house. There was nothing good on TV and Gilbert couldn't be bothered to use his laptop for anything, thus leaving him lying on his bed thinking. There was a lot more he could have been thinking of but instead his mind strayed towards Matthew, yet again.

_What did actually mean when he said "I'm sorry"? _Gilbert thought to himself.

Gilbert actually didn't know why Matthew was so unnoticed and why he was fine with being so. He knew that Matthew was happier when he was spoken to and recognised, but he never seemed to seek for the attention; he was just happy to receive it, he was never upset when he was spoken over or ignored.

"_I wonder if I should pay more attention to him…"_

Gilbert swore to himself. What was he talking about? All he was thinking of at that moment, was Matthew. Every thought, was Matthew. Why was it full of Matthew? Even when he was home from hospital, he thought of Matthew.

There was nothing special about him. Gilbert already confirmed that, even though he was noting special, he was special. He wasn't considered special by anyone else but instead ignored. It annoyed Gilbert that they forgot him or mistook him for Alfred somehow. From what he knew, they had no relation.

"He's not special to them, but I think he's special." Gilbert thought outloud.

It took a few seconds for Gilbert to even process what he had just said to himself.

"I think he's special? He's special to me…? What…he's my special person?" Words yet again came from Gilbert's mouth instead of being thought.

The words were slowly sinking into his brain.

_Special to me_…_special person._

The room seemed to grow colder for a bit and for once, there seemed to be silence inside. The only was the sound of hail. It wasn't the silence like in Matthew's house where it was tranquil, but it was a silence of realization.

"Shit… what have I just said…?"Gilbert shouted to himself over the hailstones pattering outside his window.

The cool of the room was slowly fading for Gilbert as his face grew hotter. He tried to deny what he just said to himself, but he knew it was true. However much he wanted it not to, he knew, somewhere inside, that he meant those words and that they held truth. In a frustrated matter, he pulled at his hair and pressed his fingers on his forehead in an attempt to calm hid thoughts down. He took something close by to hold to brace himself from what he was about to say.

"Matthew…is my special person?"


End file.
